How Many ”I Love You’s” Is Too Much?

Can your soulmate ever say “I Love You” too often?

I doubt it.

Of course, you first need a warm, loving, awesome soulmate to find out.

For those of you fortunate ones who are living life with your soulmate, challenge yourself to UP your love sharing.

Use every opportunity to tell them how much love and appreciate them, (and chances are once you start the process, they will follow along and share more love with you).

Get creative.

Tuck a little “I Love You” post-it note into their purse or pocket.


Or put it behind the sun visor in their car, under their pillow, on the bathroom mirror, so that it’s the first thing they see in the morning or send a middle of the day text or email.

I don’t have any scientific studies on this but I’ll bet saying” I Love You” more often is also great for your lovers health…boosting their immune system and creating more feel-good hormones in their body.

If you come up with some fun and creative ways to say “I Love You,” please let me know and I will share them here in a future newsletter.

Wishing you love, laughter, and magical kisses,

Arielle

P.S. If manifesting a soulmate is your priority, then I invite you to my last weekend workshop of the year at the breathtakingly beautiful Esalen the weekend of May 8-10. Details for both here: https://www.arielleford.com/events/

How to Have MORE, better SEX (at any age)

On my most recent episode of BIG LOVE PODCAST, my special guest is sexpert, Susan Bratton.

Known as the trusted hot sex advisor to millions,™  Susan is a walking, talking brain trust on everything from how to more, better sex at any age to how & why money impacts your sex life.

We had a blasting talking about:

Communication skills for discussing sex with your mate, even when you’ve been together for decades.

How to train your partner to be a great lover without insulting them.

Why men should never use antibacterial mouthwash (it causes erectile dysfunction!)

The newest and best sex toys for couples (some of these sound like so much fun!)

The Platinum Rule every couple should follow.

Why she adamantly opposes pornography.

The cutting edge lasers for vaginal and penis rejuvenation and so much more!

Susan is offering a terrific free gift to you called The Sexual Soulmate Pact at www.susanbratton.com/arielle.

And you can listen to us here

Wishing you love, laughter and magical kisses,

 Arielle

P.S. If manifesting a soulmate is your priority, then I invite you for the only two LIVE in person events I am doing this year.

I will be in Chicago at the Infinity Foundation for a one-day workshop on

Saturday, April 27th  and I will be teaching at the breathtakingly beautiful

Esalen the weekend of May 8-10. Details for both here: https://www.arielleford.com/events/

 

What Law & Order Taught Me About Love

One of my favorite TV series of the last 20 years is Law and Order. I avidly watch all of the various versions of the show and often fall asleep to re-runs! I’m always impressed with how the defense attorneys stand up for their unlikable clients, working hard to prove that one is “innocent until proven guilty.”

Recently Brian was admonishing me, for the millionth time, about leaving crumbs on the kitchen counter. This has been going on forever.
I just don’t see crumbs!

He told me (again) how the crumbs attract ants (also an ongoing issue).
My first reaction (as usual) was to get defensive thinking, “it’s just a few ants.”
But then I thought, what if I had to defend Brian’s reaction and really stand up for him and make a case for why he was right???

So, I put on my defense counselor hat and argued to myself, “well of course he doesn’t want to attract ants because he doesn’t want to kill anything, not even an ant!” (FYI, he regularly rescues little critters like when I find a Daddy Longlegs in the bathtub).
Arguing on his behalf I said to myself,
“Doesn’t it make sense to not cause any additional ants to come into the open where they will most certainly be killed?”

Verdict: he’s innocent.

I recommend you try this Law & Order approach the next time anyone triggers a negative reaction in you. The BIG exception to this is if they are doing something really bad, or illegal, or they are abusing you in anyway, or in active addiction, then this approach is not for you. (And remember this is why God invented trained professionals to help you work through the tough stuff.)

Wishing you love, laughter and magical kisses,

Arielle
P.S. Meet Me in Chicago or Big Sur, CA– I will be in Chicago at the Infinity Foundation for The Soulmate Secret LIVE workshop Saturday, April 27th and I will be teaching at the breathtakingly beautiful Esalen weekend of May 8-10. Details here: https://www.arielleford.com/events/

Do Opposites Really Attract?

A few years ago I was at a gathering of personal growth experts and leaders. Many have names you would recognize. All would consider themselves “spiritual” people.

At dinner, I was seated next to a very handsome 50-something man who was the boyfriend of one of our members. Let’s call her Julie and call him John. Julie had been a divorcee for nearly two decades, and in spite of her best efforts to find love, wasn’t having any luck. She is a bit of a “perfectionist” and had a lengthy and detailed “must have” list that honestly sounded like the “male version of her.”

I asked John how they met. He lit up and told me they met at a charity Gala where they had randomly been seated next to each other and sparks flew.
I asked him what he loved about being with Jill: He explained he works as an orthopedic surgeon he also volunteers around the world with Doctors Without Borders. He is a really solid, loving guy who grew up in a happy home. When he met Jill he had never meditated, done yoga, or heard of Deepak Chopra or Jack Canfield.

One day Jill took him to hear Deepak speak about the mind-body connection and he was fascinated and wanted to learn more.
Watching how Jill leads her life with a positive attitude, he decided to try more of these things and he slowly began to align with Jill’s most important values. He saw how doing these things would alleviate stress and also how they could help his patients heal better and faster. Jill became a real gift in every area of his life. John brought love, devotion, security, and fun to Jill’s life.

The point of this story is that if Jill had insisted on finding a man who had done the things on her list such as extensive inner-work (which he didn’t really need because not everyone has gut-wrenching childhood wounds to recover from), and if she had demanded that her soulmate be a meditator, yogi and seeker, they would have never met. Fortunately for Jill, the Universe intervened and sent her what she really most needed (him too!).
Trying to “dictate to the Universe” isn’t always helpful.

While I do believe that you can specifically ask for what you most desire, I also believe that many people don’t first look to more important things such as “how do you most want to feel” with your soulmate and “what is your soul most calling for.”

If you are seeking to feel loved, cherished, adored, and supported with a devoted partner, the truth is there are many potential partners if you eliminate things that truly will not contribute to your long term happiness because meditation and yoga and working on yourself relentlessly are zero indication of someone’s actual values. (Just ask the women who are trying to indict Russell Simmons on sexual assault charges).

My belief is that there can be great attraction from opposites as long as there is also connection, compatibility, clear communication and a shared vision for the future with that person.

If you are single, and don’t want to be, GREAT NEWS, it’s never been easier than it is right now to find love. Discover how when you come to one of my LIVE events and let’s get you on the path to Big Love asap. https://www.arielleford.com/events/

Wishing you love, laughter and magical kisses,

Arielle

Are You OPEN to Magic & Miracles?

Here’s what I love most about the Law of Attraction: it works!
And nearly every day, since 1984, I have more and more proof that it
works.

Now I know many of you have lots of proof that it hasn’t worked for you in the past and that is no reason to give up on it.
It’s a delicate process that takes time to master and has “laws” that take time to understand…especially the one about Divine Timing which can be the most frustrating because you can’t have what you want as fast as you say you want it.
There are many ways we approach manifesting a desire.

Some of us take the “if it’s meant to be it will just happen” approach.
Others take charge and go into “make it happen” mode.
I believe that it’s a combination of the two that is the winning ticket.
I believe that manifesting your desire has a certain amount of ” meant-to-be-ness to it… AND it requires a big dose of “make-it-happen-ness.”
Practicing intention, surrender, focus, and detachment coupled with trust, belief, knowingness, and patience is the recipe for success.
And I realize that this is a paradox….

How does one be both intentional and surrendered?
When I am being intentional, I have a clear feeling and picture of what my desire is AND I also am detached from the outcome.
I know and trust that life will continue to be great whether or not my desire is fulfilled.
I surrender to divine timing and to destiny (knowing this or something better is on the way) and my happiness and wellbeing isn’t dependent on having my wishes granted.

This is a daily “conscious” practice that requires emotional maturity and awareness.
It’s worth the effort to master this practice as it will give you freedom to be “with what is” while manifesting your deepest desires!
If you are willing to give a little time, energy, intention and attention to your desires (and many of you already have, but maybe make time for just a little bit more), they will be yours!

Wishing you love, laughter and magical kisses,

Arielle

Is Self Love A Pre- Requisite To Soulmate Love?

Self Love is the hot topic in the personal growth movement these days and when it comes to finding soulmate love, there are a lot of myths that until you love yourself first, you won’t be able to get anyone else to love you. Can this really be true?

My experience has been that most women and some men (at least in the Northern hemisphere) live with a negative, critical voice in their heads that is often filled with ugly, shaming thoughts, self-doubt, and brings with it feelings of never being “good enough.”

And, I began to wonder, do you really have to eliminate that persistent voice in order to find true love? Do we really need to be 100% in love with ourselves to experience Big Love?

I don’t think so.

What is required is to learn how to “talk back” to that voice and create strategies to love yourself more and better. This includes a big dose of self-awareness so that when the “voice surfaces” you kick its butt!

For instance, you walk past a mirror and immediately react by thinking “God, you look like a total piece of $#it today.” Immediately stop. Walk back to the mirror, give yourself a big smile and blow yourself a kiss and say something warm and loving to your reflection. This is called self-care and self-soothing. Over time, you can change your habitual negative thinking by in-putting loving and uplifting thoughts and beliefs about yourself. And, please, never forget that just because you have a thought does not make it true!

Now, as for soulmate love, one of the greatest, most awesome things about living your life with your soulmate, is that you begin to heal each other in unimaginable ways. When you spend time with someone who loves all of you – the good, the bad and the ugly, you begin to love yourself even more.

So many are “waiting“ to actively seek their soulmate because they feel stuck in how they feel about themselves. This is a very selfish thing to do.

Why? Because just as you desire to spend your life with your soulmate, they are also seeking you. And, if you are holed up at home, on the couch, watching mindless reality TV, they can’t find you!

Now, while learning to love yourself a little bit, more and more, it’s also important to know that once you do manifest the love of your life, you teach them how to treat you by the way they witness how you treat yourself. I learned this from my husband Brian. Once we got married and began living together, I noticed how he always prioritized his health and well-being. At first, I made up stories about how selfish he was because he wasn’t always flexible about the time he took to mediate and exercise. When I finally asked him about it his response floored me. He explained that by sticking to his personal care schedule, he was able to fill himself up so that the rest of the day he had more love and more energy to give to me and the rest of the world.

Wow. What an insight that was for me. I soon began to follow in his footsteps.

Self-love is important and please know that if your soul is calling for a soulmate, the voice in your head shouldn’t be a barrier to love.

Wishing you love, laughter and magical kisses,

Arielle

 

How To Be A Powerful Manifestor

I just returned from a wonderful weekend teaching the Soulmate Secret Workshop at the beautiful Omega Institute.  It was so “Fall” like!  Crisp, chilly, weather with turning leaves in a variety of fiery colors, and a beautiful group of souls ready to manifest love.

One of the questions I was asked was “how did you become a master manifestor?”   It is an important and powerful question and applies to ALL forms of manifesting.  Here is what I know for sure:

Successful manifesting requires something akin to driving with your foot on the gas and the brake at the same time. On the one hand, we need to be clear about our intentions, and be able to feel in very cell of our body that what we have asked for IS already ours, and be willing to take action towards our goals. Simultaneously, we must stay detached from the outcome and live in a state of surrender. 

Now you might be thinking, “Whoa, that doesn’t make any sense!”

But it does.

Think of it this way: When the seeds of a flower have been planted, and the first leaves begin to sprout, the gardener doesn’t tug on the leaves every day to make the plant grow faster. They trust that Mother Nature knows how to grow all on her own, thank you very much.

There are many ways we approach manifesting our desire, whether it’s more money, a soulmate, a new career, or the perfect little black dress.

Some of us take the “if it’s meant to be it will just happen” approach. Others take charge and go into “make it happen” mode. I believe that it’s a combination of the two that is the winning ticket.

I believe that manifesting your heart’s desire has a certain amount of “meant-to-be-ness” to it… AND it requires a big dose of “make-it-happen-ness.”

Practicing intention, surrender, focus, and detachment coupled with trust, belief, knowingness, and patience is the recipe for success.

And I realize that this is a paradox….

How does one be both intentional and surrendered?

When I am being intentional, I have a clear feeling and picture of what my desire is AND I also am detached from the outcome.

I know and trust that life will continue to be great whether or not my desire is fulfilled.

I surrender to divine timing and to destiny (knowing this or something better is on the way) and my happiness and well-being isn’t dependent on having my wishes granted.

This is a daily “conscious” practice that requires emotional maturity and awareness. It’s worth the effort to master this practice, as it will give you freedom to be “with what is” while manifesting your deepest desires!

Those who successfully manifest have learned and surrendered to the fact that it’s not our job to know where, when, or how our desire will appear. We don’t have to micromanage every encounter or anticipate every detail. Our job is to simply prepare ourselves in body, mind, and soul and then relax into the knowledge that what we’ve asked for – wherever it may be at this moment – is on the way.

When you notice that you are in fear or doubt or disbelief that your desired outcome is on the way, allow yourself to spend three minutes or less fully feeling the worst of these negative emotions. Set a time and then dive in and exaggerate your fears and doubts. Make it really ugly. No positive thinking allowed! IF you do this you will soon begin to laugh because your rational mind will kick in, reminding you that these thoughts are just not true. Then, having released the pressure of the negativity, fill yourself back up with kind, loving affirmations that your desired outcome IS already yours and remember to be both intentional and surrendered!

Wishing you love, laughter and magical kisses,

Arielle

What Do Men Want?

What do men want? That’s a big question and one that I have been researching for years. In fact, when my next book comes out next January, I will be unveiling my take on this topic as well.

I recently came across Kate, who has great information and a story about what men want. If you are looking to gain insight into the mind of a man, this is worth checking out.

Below is the start of her wisdom and if you want more, you can click on the link at the end for a video that goes deeper. (…and in full disclosure, she does have a $37 product to sell with the full scoop of what she has to teach on this topic.)

Kate says:

Having a man close to you is a wonderful feeling…

  • The warmth of his embrace…
  • The smell of his skin…
  • The safety and comfort when you’re near him…

And one of the most frustrating things a woman can feel is the suspicion that you might have accidentally pushed him away…

That you may have even scared a good man off for good.

Well, the truth is this (WARNING – I’m not going to sugar-coat this): The reason he doesn’t want you or desire you is simply because you never made him feel like you really “GET” him.

imagesYou Gotta Show Him You GET Him!

Let me explain…

Most women think it’s enough to make herself look appealing by fixing her hair, makeup, and clothes. The usual “peacocking” stuff that captures his eye. The thought goes that, if you make yourself LOOK good enough, he’ll desire you and fall in love with you. But this is backwards. And it feels “desperate” to men.

YES, you absolutely do need to be appealing to the eye (and that does NOT mean you need to look like a supermodel or have backbreaking boobs.) There is no question that this will initiate interest. HOWEVER… What he REALLY needs to feel is that you UNDERSTAND him as a MAN…. And you’d be VERY surprised how easy it is to send a guy the wrong signal and make him think you don’t get him AT ALL.

For example: A lot of women pretend to understand a man in order to pry open his heart. But it backfires on her when she doesn’t do it the right way. Like when she pretends to be interested in his hobbies or sports or television shows, but it’s just her faking “good behavior.” You know, that “getting to know you” pretending that both men and women sometimes do.

QUICK SECRET: Men And Women Have Developed a Keen Radar For BS!

Most human conversations (these days, anyway) tend to have the feel of: “Mmm hmmm. Mmm hmmm. Just waiting for my turn to speak.”

To be fair, we all get a little nervous on dates. And we want to yak it up and make a good impression. But sometimes we gotta drop the whole “Facebook culture” thing and not need to broadcast ourselves or our lives.  SO when a woman pretends (even if she’s really sure she’s putting up a good act of interest), an alarm goes off in his head when he figures it out (and believe me, he DOES) – and then slams the door to his love on you.

It can happen on the first date – or the umpteenth… There’s no statute of limitations here. You have to show him that you not only understand MEN – but the unique things about HIM as a man.

  • Do you know WHY men brag? (Hint: This presentation will explain that whole “egotistical braggart” thing some guys do.)
  • Do you know what the sign of a man’s interest is that you’re probably missing? (Yup, it’s the presentation, too…)
  • Do you know how to make him feel like a man, and not just a possible meal ticket? (That’s a real concern for a lot of guys.)

So, we men know when a woman “GETS” us – and is on our team – and when it’s just a trick to get us to dig her. But if you show him the “Secret Signal” he’s looking for – he instantly melts for you. If you show him this Signal, you can have just about any man spellbound – IRRESISTIBLY desiring you. (It’s almost like cheating.) Oh, and if you think that the “Secret Signal” men are looking for is SEX – that’s NOT it!

TIP: the “worst” mistake you can make is to sleep with him too quickly just because you think he might “move on” if you don’t…

Let me explain…

I just got off the phone with Rebecca – a client, who’s now a close friend of mine. After losing her husband to another woman, at the age of 39, well – she’s falling back in love, and talking about a new baby. Now, if you had seen Rebecca just 3 months ago at the mall, where they had an argument so loud and scary that the police had to escort them out (no joke)… You would NEVER have thought this was possible. But she pulled it off… I gotta hand it to her.

You see, what Rebecca discovered was the ONE thing that men desire most of all from women. And if you think it’s that same three letter word that starts with S and ends with X….NOPE. Not that at all.

Again, so many women assume that this is what men want, and ALL they want. It’s such a well-known and accepted fact about men that it must be true… right?

Actually, no.

SECRET TIP: What Do Men Want?

I’ll give you a little hint about what he needs – It’s called APPRECIATION. Men THRIVE on appreciation. In fact, he wants to feel this more than he wants to feel love from you.

Why? Because it’s one of the signals that tells him he’s doing things RIGHT. It’s the ONE way he knows he’s making you happy, when you appreciate him. Appreciation is the male form of LOVE!  It’s also one of the reasons he falls in love in the first place. But, inevitably, the appreciation starts to wane. And then the distance creeps in….He seems distant or hard to reach.

OR – if you’re just going out on a first date with him, but things fizzle – and you never hear from him again. What happened? Chances are, you missed showing him THIS secret signal.

Here – let me show you how to stop this from ever happening again…

If you’d like to know what this Secret Signal is that makes men desire you uncontrollably, I’d like you to watch this new video presentation. And you’ll also discover something incredibly exciting – a NEW way for you to unlock the secrets of the male mind. Don’t let something interrupt you – Go Here NOW!

FYI, the video is about a half hour and you can start and stop it whenever you wish.

Wishing you love, laughter and magical kisses,

Arielle

The Magic of A Bucket List

The Magic of A Bucket List

About one year ago Brian and I were talking about the best concerts we have ever been to. I realized that I had never seen one of my all time favorite singers perform live….the amazing Stevie Wonder! In that moment, I declared that going to a Stevie Wonder concert was the #1 item on my bucket list. Six months later, I was reading the Los Angeles Times and came across a story for his upcoming concerts. We immediately bought 3rd row center seats.

What a night that was.

Best concert I’ve ever seen.

It exceeded all my dreams of seeing Stevie Wonder live in concert.

Having a bucket list is different from daily or yearly goals. It fulfills a big dream and creates an experience and warm memories that will last a lifetime.

Bri & Ari Bali gardenFor many years, visiting Bali was on my bucket list. I had heard about it, seen photos, and of course read about it in Elizabeth Gilbert’s book Eat, Pray, Love.

Three years we ago we went for the first time. Not only is Bali the most beautiful place I’ve ever been, spending time there provided me with unexpected and magical things I never anticipated.

Bali is a very spiritual island in Indonesia that is made up of Hindu’s who pray every day. These are happy, smiling, friendly people who seem to exist to make others happy. The weather is tropical, the food delicious, and the terrain and sites are like eye-candy.

I had expected the trip to be a fun and relaxing vacation, but I was blown away by how just BEING in Bali transformed me.

Energetically, this is a very special place.

The lack of density, the gentleness, the soothing energy and vibes, healthy food, and inherent mysticism of Bali took me to a deep, profound, healing and relaxing space. Prior to arriving there, I knew that I was stressed out, but what I didn’t know was how emotionally, physical and mentally depleted I was.

Bali wdancersBali changed my life.

Being there allowed me to “remove” all kinds of energies and beliefs that were holding me back and transformed my life for the better. Which led to unexpected amounts of creativity, better health and prosperity.

“Creating a transformative workshop in Bali” went to #1 on my bucket list.

Guess what happened next? I received an invitation from two women who have spent the last 20 years producing sacred journeys and workshops in Bali (asking to meet with us about the possibility of creating a workshop there). After learning about their successful experiences and meeting them, seeing and feeling the love they bring to their events, Brian and I agreed to do this!

We have named it: Manifest Your Biggest Unmet Dream (even if you don’t know what it is) Magical Mystery Tour of Bali.

We’d love for you to join us August 29 – September 6, 2015.

We will also be hosting a teleconference to share more details on March 12th at 5pmPT /8pmET. Sign up here for the call.

Or, if you are ready to just say YES TO BALI, go here: www.heartlabtours.com.

Wishing you love, laughter and magical kisses,

Arielle

Are you really in love? (plus find LOVE on Facebook)

Did you get your heart broken in high school or college?

Or, did you break someone’s heart?

Are you single now?

Are they?

Fascinating new research shows that if you reconnect with someone from your past that you were once in love with and both of you are now single, there is a 70% chance that you can reconnect and have a happy life together!

Helen Fisher heartOne of my favorite TV shows, CBS Sunday Morning, recently did a segment on this topic, featuring Dr. Helen Fisher, and highlighted several couples that found each other again, including one woman who reunited with her Ex via Facebook. In spite of the fact that one of them dumped the other in the long ago past, these couples reconnected and are now happily married.

What happened?

According to Dr. Fisher, anthropologist, love expert, and Rutgers University professor, the brain chemistry and circuitry that first had them fall in love was “re-ignited.”

Why? Because chances are you will still find each other attractive, and you share important history together. There is a built in comfort level:  You already know each other…family, friends, and all kinds of background info. If you re-connect, you could have your brain chemistry triggered and voila, romance re-blossoms!

Dr. Fisher and her research partner, Dr. Lucy Brown, have a new website, where you can learn much more about love and they offer a fantastic quiz where you can discover if you really are “in love.”  They call it a Love Calculator and it measures the Passionate Love Scale. Try it now at www.theAnatomyofLove.com.

Wishing you love, laughter and magical kisses,

Arielle