Catch A Wave (In Spite of the Wobble)

The first thing I see out my window each morning are the surfers. We live across the street from South Bird Rock, the best “break” in San Diego and only the most expert surfers dare to ride here.

Not only do you have to be an advanced surfer, you also have to hike down a cliff and then paddle out a quarter mile or more to get in position.

Some days, like today, there are as many as a dozen who are wildly riding the high surf.

Other mornings there are just a few wet-suit clad dudes sitting calmly on their boards scanning the horizon for the next wave.

On my daily walks around the neighborhood, I pass two other surf spots. One is suited to the “intermediate” surfers …it has a shorter hike down the cliff, and a shorter paddle out and the waves are a bit smaller.

This seems to be the preferred spot for the older, grayer guys.

The third location is what I call beginners beach. It’s the most picturesque, has the most activity, and by far the littlest waves.

While I was watching those surfers today I was observing how much fun most seem to be having. I could feel their glee when they stood up, caught the wave, knees bent, arms extended. In spite of some wobbling to keep their balance, most succeeded to ride these two and three- foot waves. They were stoked!

While I have no desire to don a wetsuit and paddle out in the 67-degree water, I am learning to surf the waves of uncertainty of this time of Covid.

I am finally developing a little muscle memory, resilience, and acceptance for the ways things are.

I’ve stopped wondering “when is this going to end,” and started to just be with the not knowing and then tuning into the excitement of how to make the best of what is.

I don’t know when the next big wave is coming.

I don’t know if it’s a wave I can ride or if I will “wipe out,” but I do know that right now, in this moment, I have everything that I need.

Wishing you love, laughter and magical kisses,

Arielle

John Lennon Got It All Wrong

Don’t get me wrong, I love John Lennon and I love the Beatles, but their song “All You Need is Love,” a lovely sentiment to be sure, is also far from the truth.

The wild and wonderful state of “being in love” is natures greatest trick to get us to keep the species going, but it’s no predictor of a long term, happy, satisfying relationship.

We need more than just love to make love work.

I like to call being in love “the socially acceptable form of insanity.”

It’s a cocktail of adrenalin, dopamine, oxytocin and some other feel good hormones oozing from your brain throughout your body (and it does feel soooo good), but when it wears off (and it always wears off somewhere between six months to three years) you then are confronted with a real, live, fallible human being, and if you haven’t chosen well, things will devolve pretty quickly.

For those of you singles who are desiring a lifelong partner, it’s crucial to understand that true, adult mature love is much more than a feeling.

Love is a behavior. It’s a choice, a decision, a way of being where you and your partner are devoted to each other’s happiness, health and well-being.

And, while there are plenty of good feelings to this kind of love, there are also times when you don’t feel the love and it doesn’t mean you don’t love them.

As you are connecting with potential partners add these to your selection criteria: connection, great communication, compatibility and most importantly a shared vision for the future. (And be sure to ask yourself, is this someone that I would enjoy being in quarantine with for the next time we are in lockdown?)

Wishing you love, laughter and magical kisses,

Arielle

What Does It Take Too Have BIG LOVE?

Yesterday was our 22nd wedding anniversary. As I thought about the wonder of it all, I asked my beloved soulmate, Brian, what his thoughts are on how we have created 22 years of togetherness….what he thought our “secret of success” is.

Here is what he said:

“Our sacred union was ignited in an instant when I literally found myself immersed in a grand conspiracy of love with the Woman/Goddess of my dreams 23 years ago. The day we met the magic began and the Universe/God supported our journey of love on every level. It was a ginormous love explosion where both our tides of love rose together into one ocean of love and where love began to dance with itself!

We celebrate our miracle of love every day as we live grounded in Higher Love with the necessary ingredients of respect, honor, joy, unlimited fun, attentiveness, acceptance, admiration and care of the other’s well-being.

And, for me, living amidst all the wonder of our deep heart connection as well as living through all the challenges a relationship can bring, all of this has generated the glue and the foundation that has solidified the essence of our sacred relationship.

Our devotion to each other continues to be the catalyst to knowing and living our destiny: Big Love.”

Sigh. He truly is a heart chakra on legs, and I am so grateful to spend my life with him. He is my best friend, my greatest teacher, my rock, and even when things get rocky, we are always there for each other.

And, I am very clear that while our meeting was “magical,” I conjured up a ton of manifesting magic to prepare myself, on every level, to meet and spend my life with him. I worked through my blocks, barriers, and limiting beliefs about love and then committed myself to learning how to be a great partner.

While I feel very lucky, none of this happened by chance or by luck.

Using the ancient wisdom of the Law of Attraction, I co-created with the Universe meeting Brian.

Finding love and keeping love (and ultimately being love) can be acquired skills.

If finding love is your desire, let me show you the way.

Wishing you love, laughter and magical kisses,

Arielle

Now more than ever, Be A Pleasure Puppy

I don’t know about you but lately it seems that everyone I know is totally stressed out – not just from their own lives but from the “frequency in the field.”

From the racial tensions and the horrific killing of African American men, women and children, to Covid-19 and the global pandemic, along with the economy and money worries, most of us are stressed to the max.

Even if you are safe, and your life is peachy right now, chances are you are picking up on the energies of those around you.

It’s almost unavoidable.

This is why I am such a big advocate for all of us to become daily “pleasure puppies” and find ways each day to consciously choose to reduce our stress levels and add more pleasure.

For women, this means doing things that build oxytocin (the cuddling/bonding hormone) and for men this means ways to build testosterone. The more you have of these hormones, the better you can handle stress.

I’ve been doing more research and here are some new ways to do both:

To rebuild oxytocin, ladies try this:

  • Tell someone you love them.
  • Share a meal.
  • Pray and/or meditate
  • Volunteer and donate to charity.
  • Be creative – paint, color, knit, throw pots, whatever sparks creativity in you.
  • Cuddle your pets.
  • Get and give 8 hugs a day.
  • Dancing, listening to music or making music.
  • Indulging in your favorite guilty pleasure – a delicious piece of chocolate or freshly baked bread, whatever makes you drool.

Men, to rebuild testosterone try this:

  • Exercise, especially weightlifting, and high intensity interval training.
  • Chop wood!
  • Play or watch your favorite sport on TV.

Do the Power Pose: Stand with legs shoulder width a part. Put your hands into fists on your waist (Like Superman), tilt your chin up and look at the ceiling and for two solid minutes shout out empowering phrases such as: I am strong, I am courageous, I am powerful, I am energized, I am on purpose, etc.

And one activity that builds both oxytocin and testosterone is to have sex with someone you love!

Learning to manage our stress levels is critical to keeping our immune system strong and healthy, so become a pleasure puppy and consciously do one thing every day that will build your oxytocin or testosterone levels.

Wishing you love, laughter and magical kisses,
Arielle

The NEW RULES of Dating

Covid 19 and the murder of George Floyd have changed our world forever.

Not just in North America but around the globe. Billions of people are experiencing these shared traumas. We literally are all in this together.

No one knows when (or if) it will be safe again to sit shoulder to shoulder at a Broadway play or a concert or attend sporting events that once had as many as 70,000 crazed fans cheering on their favorite football, baseball, hockey or soccer teams.

What we do know is that life goes on and we will find ways to adapt to a new normal.

For those of you who are single, and have been quarantined alone, wishing you had a soulmate, life partner, best friend, lover and safe place to land person to share it with, I have some good news: it’s never been easier to manifest your soulmate than right now.

This may sound counter intuitive, it may even sound crazy, but it’s not.

Even though you can’t go out and meet someone at social events, or at the office, or even the local coffee shop, you can easily be fixed up by a friend or even better, and very effective: date online.

The latest statistics show that nearly 40% of marriages now begin online. Dating online works IF you know how to work it and unfortunately, most women don’t know how to successfully use this amazing tool. It can be more fun than you imagine!

And, here’s why this is such good news:

  1. Video dating allows you to sort through prospects faster than meeting at a Starbucks. Because of the current situation we are all in, you can utilize video dating to interact in deeper, more meaningful ways.
  2. You can engage with a stranger and ask questions that in the past would not have been appropriate. You can discover in minutes things such as: are they divorced but living with their ex? You can ask questions that reveal their emotional IQ without seeming intrusive such as asking them to show you their favorite mask. By doing this you quickly discover if you are on the same page about wearing a mask or if they are someone who thinks it’s unnecessary.
  3. There are ways to make video dating fun and creative that reveal more about them. And, if you do all this correctly, video dating is super safe in ways that meeting in person are not right now.

This Friday, June 12th 4:00-6:00pmPT, I am teaching a LIVE, one-time only, two hour workshop on Zoom on how to do ALL of the above and much more. This event is hosted through 1440 Multiversity. The cost is $45 and if you are seriously ready to manifest your soulmate, discover the simple steps to make it happen.

Register here!

Wishing you love, laughter and magical kisses,

Arielle

Drenched in Holiness

These times of chaos, turmoil, and massive uncertainty require faith and a deepening with our relationship with the Divine. Spending time in prayer, meditation, poetry, being in nature, having gratitude for all that is, cuddling with loved ones and pets…all will infuse the field with love and healing.

My beautiful late sister, Debbie Ford, wrote a prayer book, Your Holiness, and below is one of my favorites.

Drenched in Holiness

Dear God, Spirit, Divine Mother,

On this day I ask You to grant this request ~

May I know who I am and what I am, every moment of every day

May I be a catalyst for light and love and bring inspiration to those whose eyes I meet

May I have the courage to speak my voice, even when I’m scared

May I have the humility to follow my heart, and the passion to live my Soul’s desires

May I seek to know the highest truth and dismiss the gravitational pull of my lower self

May I embrace and love the totality of myself ~ my darkness as well as my light

May I be brave enough to hear my heart ~ to let it soften so that I may gracefully choose faith over fear

Today is my day to surrender anything that stands between the sacredness of my humanity and my divinity

May I be drenched in my Holiness and engulfed by Your love

May all else melt away

And so it is.

~Debbie Ford

Wishing you love, laughter and magical kisses,

Arielle

True, fascinating story of the origin of Love Letter From God

Before I tell you an extraordinary story, read this:

Love Letter from God

Everyone longs to give themselves completely to someone — to have a deep soul relationship with another, to be loved thoroughly and exclusively. But God says:

“No, not until you are satisfied and fulfilled and content with being loved by Me alone. I love you, my child, and until you discover that only in Me is your satisfaction to be found, you will not be capable of the perfect human relationship that I have planned for you. You will never be united with another until you are united with Me — exclusive of anyone or anything else, exclusive of any other desires or longings. I want you to stop planning, stop wishing, and allow Me to give you the most thrilling plan existing — one that you can’t imagine. I want you to have the best. Please allow Me to bring it to you. Just keep experiencing that satisfaction knowing that I AM. Keep learning and listening to the things I tell you . . . You must wait.

Don’t be anxious. Don’t worry. Don’t look around at the things others have gotten or that I’ve given to them. Don’t look at the things you think you want. You just keep looking off and away up to Me, or you’ll miss what I want to show you.

And then, when you’re ready, I’ll surprise you with a love far more wonderful than any would ever dream. You see, until you are ready and until the one I have for you is ready, I am working even this very minute to have both of you ready at the same time. Until you are both satisfied exclusively with Me and with the life I have prepared for you, you won’t be able to experience the love that exemplifies your relationship with Me…and this is perfect love.

And dear one, I want you to have this most wonderful love, I want you to see in flesh a picture of your relationship with Me, and to enjoy materially and concretely the everlasting union of beauty and perfection and love that I offer you with Myself.

Know that I love you utterly, I am God. Believe it and be satisfied.

Love,

God

I received a copy of this letter more than a decade ago when I was writing The Soulmate Secret. The words resonated deeply with me and I was curious about the author of the letter….clearly someone with a very close connection and understanding of God had penned this wisdom.

I searched the internet but never found out where it came from, thus I listed it in my book as “Author Unknown.”

From time to time I would wonder about the source.

Well, recently the most amazing thing happened! I received an email that led me to the woman who brought forth the letter. Her name is Dr. Patty Sadallah and she is a Professor at Christian Leadership University serving master’s and doctoral students and she is also an award-winning author of several Christian books.

When I spoke with Dr. Patty, I asked her how she came to receive this letter and she shared with me one of the most remarkable stories I have ever heard.

Below is a shortened version of the story and at the end of this, I will tell you how to read the full story!

While Patty was a college student in 1979, she was dating Fred, who was a Christian, while she was not. One weekend, at a student leadership retreat, she was assigned Maureen as her roommate and they had an instant connection. They stayed up all night talking about God’s love and salvation and by sunrise, Patty was a Christian. She couldn’t wait to share the exciting news with Fred.

Unfortunately, just as Patty found God, God was directing Fred to break up with her and boom, her heart was broken. She immediately called Maureen, who strangely said that she was expecting her call. God had told Maureen that Fred was going to break up with her and that she had a letter for her: a letter from God saying that He needed to be her first love.

For many months Maureen was Patty’s rock and confident, praying with her and teaching her from the Bible. One day, as Patty was feeling better, she called Maureen only to discover that the phone number she had dialed for months was answered by a frat boy who insisted that they had been assigned that number all year and had no idea who Maureen was. Baffled, she went to the registration office only to discover there was no record of Maureen. She began to wonder if Maureen was really an angel and continued to read her comforting love letter from God. Over the years, Patty shared the letter with dozens of others suffering from a broken heart.

Eventually Patty married George and they began a life together. As she was moving into her new married home, she went to the Bible where she kept the dog-eared letter only to discover it was missing. Twenty-five years later God told her He would return the letter for the upcoming book she was writing. Immediately, she looked for it on the internet. The only thing she remembered was the last line “I am God. Believe it and be satisfied” and there it was, pages of postings of this love letter were online!

By now, Patty was adept at having personal conversations with Jesus and through a guided imagery process she teaches, she met with Jesus. He showed her directly that yes, He wrote the letter specifically to her, and He made sure that she received it from Maureen. She also found out that yes, Maureen is her guardian angel and she was able to reconnect with Maureen who now appeared with a full set of beautiful wings.

Is this just the most beautiful, amazing, miraculous story?

I strongly suggest you buy her book, Clips That Move Mountains to read the entire story. Clips that Move Mountains 2nd Edition is a faith-building, life-changing book of that uses short clips from popular movies such as Forrest Gump, Surf’s Up, Facing the Giants, and others to show you how to grow your relationship with God and live your best Christian life. Check out Patty’s other books at her website: www.PattySadallah.com And, if you want to have your own encounter with Jesus Patty’s guided imagery will introduce you to Jesus in your own “Special Place” http://bit.ly/2g8v8iu

I am grateful to have finally solved the mystery of the origin of this letter!

Wishing you love, laughter and magical kisses,

Arielle

The Unbearable Lightness of Liminality

The phrase “the Unbearable Lightness of Being” was introduced as the title of a 1984 novel by Milan Kundera. (It also became a movie). It uses Friedrich Nietzsche’s doctrine of the Eternal Return to illustrate Lightness.

The idea of “eternal return,” explains that our universe and our existence, has occurred an infinite number of times in the past, and is cyclical and will continue to occur forever.

This is a heady, intellectual concept, but I’ve been thinking about it lately in terms of how to make sense of the earth (and soul) shattering times we are currently in.

Last year I discovered a new word, liminal, which is also appropriate for these times.

With its origin in Latin, it literally means “on the threshold.”

Certainly, we are all on the threshold of a new life.

Liminal spaces are described as transformative and/or transitional.

Spaces where we feel we are on the “verge of something.”

And, being in liminal space is often unsettling, uncomfortable, and disorienting.

I made up the phrase, “the unbearable lightness of liminality,” as a way for me to try and define my current state of being.

I find it has a mystical frequency and creates a permeable container for where I am right now.

I also find it strangely comforting.

What brings you comfort these days?

Wishing you love, laughter and magical kisses,

Arielle

Wabi Sabi Quarantine

Wabi Sabi is the ancient Japanese aesthetic of seeking to discover beauty and perfection in imperfection. It seeks to find the beauty in things that are old, worn, imperfect or impermanent.

When we are in a situation beyond our control, and are finding ourselves highly annoyed or frustrated with someone’s behavior, that is the time to practice Wabi Sabi Love: this is about having a shift in perception and making up a new and empowering story about whatever you are perceiving as broken, wrong, or just not right.

For those of us that are stressed out, frustrated or are experiencing extreme cabin fever from the quarantine, finding the beauty and perfection in the imperfection can be a challenge.

I could make a long list of all the things I don’t like about being quarantined, but now that we are in week seven, I think for me, the good things are beginning to outweigh the bad.

By digging deep into my spiritual toolkit I have been practicing things I’ve often talked about but never really had to deal with….like turning fear into love and transforming judgement into compassion. The latter being the most difficult.

As I have watched many people filling social media with wild conspiracy theories, I find myself pinging back and forth between outrage and wanting to fix them.

(I know better than to engage online about controversial things).

For the first few weeks it made me crazy, and I labeled them as crazy or stupid.

One day I asked myself, “what is the Wabi Sabi solution to my reaction?”

And here is the new Wabi Sabi story I made up: For reasons I am not meant to understand, they believe this stuff because it may just be the best coping mechanism they currently have.

This new story releases me from judgment.

It allows me to breathe deeper and to just be.

If someone or something is making you crazy and causing you to react (this does not include addiction, abuse or bad behavior – for that you must get professional help), try giving Wabi Sabi a spin.

And, if you can’t figure out a new story about their behavior, then ask yourself this: “Is this a reason not to love them?”

Wishing you love, laughter and magical kisses,

Arielle

p.s. click below to watch a free 18 minute video on Wabi Sabi Love on YouTube!

> Watch here <

p.p.s. My book Wabi Sabi Love is below:

Get the book here!

Fasten Your Seatbelt, It’s Going To Be A Bumpy Ride

Bette Davis spoke this classic line in the film All About Eve, and it’s certainly apropos for the world we are currently in.

Unless you are in deep denial, the fact is that the rug has been pulled out from under all of us and it’s going to be bumpy for quite some time.

As we adjust to being in a collective dark night of the soul, we are individually figuring out how wrap our heads around the fact that right now there are no real answers: no one can say when/if the virus will end; when/ if certainty and stability will return; or if life as we once knew it will return.

Whether you are suffering through this process or are doing great with it (or bouncing between happiness and misery), most of us are now learning to adapt to “being with not knowing.”

One of my core beliefs is this:

Contentment is being willing to accept both your happiness and your lack of it at any given moment. This is the practice of the spiritual warrior; to love what is, the good, the bad, the ugly and to remain centered in appreciation and gratitude.

Can you find contentment right now with what is? Start with the smallest baby step of gratitude… right now in this moment, who or what are you grateful for?

Wishing you love, laughter and magical kisses,

Arielle