The Importance of Beauty

More than 30 years ago, a new friend invited me to her apartment for a visit.  As we sat in her cozy living room, she served me tea in a delicate china cup that was placed on a beautiful mahogany tray that held a tiny silver teaspoon, a small plate of petit fours, a shiny silver vase holding one perfectly shaped pink rose, and a white lace trimmed cloth napkin. I felt like I was having high tea with royalty!

I told her she shouldn’t have gone to all the trouble as I would have been just as happy with a mug of tea and a paper napkin. She smiled sweetly and said to me, “Darling, this is how I serve myself tea every day.” This elegant woman then explained to me that life is short and that we must insist on having as much beauty as possible in our lives, in every way possible.  

When I left her home I immediately went to Bed, Bath and Beyond and bought myself two trays, six linen napkins, two small matching vases to begin living beautifully myself. (Fortunately, I already had some inherited china teacups.) Since that day, when at home, I rarely use paper napkins.

A few years later I became friends with another woman, who worked mostly from home.  Whenever I would visit her, she was always meticulously turned out: hair, makeup, clothing, and jewelry to match. I asked her why she went to so much trouble since most days she never saw anyone else. She explained to me that she considered herself a work of art and each day she reveled in putting herself together as colorfully and stylishly as possible.

As someone who works from home, most days I am in my yoga pants, hair in a ponytail and makeup-free unless I have a Skype or Zoom interview, but at least a few days a week I make an effort to consider myself a work of art and invest a little more time into my appearance.

In Italy, one of my favorite place on earth, they actually have a lifestyle describing this, it’s called ‘bella figura’ and it basically means making every area of your life as beautiful as it can be.

I would love to know how you add more beauty to your life!

Wishing you love, laughter, and magical kisses,

Arielle

Is Self Love A Prerequisite To Soulmate Love?

Self-love seems to be the hot topic in the personal growth movement these days and when it comes to finding soulmate love, there are a lot of myths that until you love yourself first, you won’t be able to get anyone else to love you.  Can this really be true?

My experience has been that most women (at least in the Northern hemisphere) live with a negative, critical voice in their heads that is often filled with ugly, shaming thoughts, self-doubt, and brings with it feelings of never being “good enough.”

And, I began to wonder, do you really have to eliminate that persistent voice in order to find true love?

Do we really need to be 100% in love with ourselves to experience Big Love?

I don’t think so.

What is required is to learn how to “talk back” to that voice and create strategies to love yourself more and better.  This includes a big dose of self-awareness so that when the “voice surfaces” you kick its butt!

For instance, you walk past a mirror and immediately react by thinking “God, you look like a total piece of $#it today.” Immediately stop. Walk back to the mirror, give yourself a big smile and blow yourself a kiss and say something warm and loving to your reflection.  This is called self-care and self-soothing.  Over time, you can change your habitual negative thinking by in-putting loving and uplifting thoughts and beliefs about yourself. And, please, never forget that just because you have a thought does not make it true!

Now, as for soulmate love, one of the greatest, most awesome things about living your life with your soulmate, is that you begin to heal each other in unimaginable ways. When you spend time with someone who loves all of you – the good, the bad and the ugly – you begin to love yourself even more.

So many women are “waiting“ to actively seek their soulmate because they feel stuck in how they feel about themselves.  This is a very selfish thing to do.

Why?  Because, just as you desire to spend your life with your soulmate, they are also seeking you.  And if you are holed up at home, on the couch, watching the Kardashians or the Property Brothers, they can’t find you!

Now, while learning to love yourself a little bit more and more, it’s also important to know that once you do manifest the love of your life, you teach them how to treat you by the way they witness how you treat yourself.  I learned this from my husband Brian. Once we got married and began living together, I noticed how he always prioritized his health and well-being.  At first, I made up stories about how selfish he was because he wasn’t always flexible about the time he took to meditate and exercise.  When I finally asked him about it his response floored me.  He explained that by sticking to his personal care schedule, he was able to fill himself up so that the rest of the day he had more love and more energy to give to me and the rest of the world.

Wow.  What an insight that was for me.  I soon began to follow in his footsteps.

Self-love is important and please know that if your soul is calling for a soulmate, the voice in your head shouldn’t be a barrier to love.

Wishing you love, laughter and magical kisses,

Arielle

Do You Feel Worthy of Love?

Have you noticed that, when you are feeling good about yourself, you naturally attract great people? Not just potential partners, but wonderful, interesting people.

Until we feel truly worthy – deep inside – of the love we desire, we won’t feel worthy of love on the outside. And when we aren’t revealing the truth about ourselves, that we ARE worthy of love, we develop patterns that prevent us from having the loving relationship we want and need. And when we do find a good relationship, we find ways to sabotage ourselves. Why would anybody do that

The pain caused by repeating these patterns is almost unbearable. And each “repeat” experience makes us feel less and less worthy of not only the love we deserve, but the abundant life we deserve.

_J7U3611rI’m so excited that my friend Nancy Levin has written a new book that digs into the roots and weeds out the old patterns that cause us so much suffering… opening us to receive the love and life the universe has in store for us.

Here is a taste of Nancy’s wonderful new book, Worthy: Boost Your Self-Worth to Grow Your Net Worth

When I use the term “net worth,” I really mean the degree of richness, juiciness, and fulfillment you have in all areas of your life, not just your bank account. Do you feel rich in your relationships? Do you have a wealth of activities you enjoy?

When we fear that we aren’t enough, or that we aren’t good enough, we also fear that we’ll never have enough. That fear is a self-fulfilling prophecy, in which we unconsciously make sure we never, ever have all that we need. It’s a painful arithmetic going on in the shadows of our unconscious, which many of us never even recognize.

Until we feel worthy – deep inside – of the great life we desire, we develop sabotaging patterns that prevent us from having the love, money, time, energy, health, joy, freedom we want and need. These habits are tenacious because they’re created by limiting, shadow beliefs that took hold in childhood, like “I’m not good enough” or “I’m not lovable” or “There’s something wrong with me.” At the foundation of all these beliefs is “I’m not worthy.” The belief of unworthiness drives our behaviors in all sorts of ways. The mash-up of money, love, and self-worth issues starts early – and that’s why we have to start by uncovering those old worth issues from childhood. If we don’t unwind the tangle of emotions and beliefs and fears that got encoded back then, we’ll stay stuck right where we are.

Here’s an exercise you can do right now to begin untangling and to reinforce the rewiring around your inherent worthiness!  Spend a few minutes with each question before writing anything down.

  • Ask yourself: “What’s the loudest message I’m receiving now about love?” Just listen for the message. Allow yourself to remember when you first heard that message. Do you know whose voice gave you that message? Write down a few notes about what you heard and remembered.
  • Ask yourself: “What is my first memory about love?” Allow any pictures to come to you. Maybe it’s the first time you understood there was a thing called “love.” Write a few notes about this first memory.
  • Ask now to remember a scene in which your parents/family related to love in some way with you, with each other. Write down what you remember.
  • Now go through the notes you took and identify what beliefs you think you developed as a result of what you remember.  Write them down.
  • Pick one belief to work with here and let yourself see a time you experienced a counter-example to that one belief. Come up with a time in your life when that one belief was proven untrue. Make some notes.
  • Now allow yourself to create a new positive, empowering belief to replace the old one. Write it down. Write it on your mirror in lipstick or dry erase marker. Put it on a sticky note on your laptop. Have an alarm go off on your phone several times a day and read it.

Once we’ve healed our internal wounds around worth, and we finally know we deserve all we desire, we open up to receiving the limitless love the universe has in store for us.

_worthyNancy will take you on a deep-dive into knowing and owning your worth that will forever expand what you believe you’re capable of! With Nancy’s gentle but firm guidance, you’ll do the internal work needed to replace feelings of unworthiness with a solid sense of your own value.

And the benefits will feed your heart. When you claim your worth and take back your power – financial and otherwise – get ready to watch amazing things start to happen! Everything you desire is within reach!

Get Nancy’s new book, Worthy: Boost Your Self-Worth to Grow Your Net Worth, today and you’ll also receive 5 exclusive bonus gifts that she created just for you!

Wishing you love, laughter, and magical kisses,

Arielle

P.S. If your heart’s desire is to manifest the love of your life, and you are willing to dedicate your time, attention and intention to making it happen, then I invite you to join me August 19-21 at the beautiful Omega Institute to discover how to quickly and easily make it happen! (This is the only time this year I am offering this weekend workshop.)