Did you know that more than one-third of marriages now begin via online dating sites?
Did you know that couples that meet online are twice as likely to marry than those who meet offline?
And, did you know that couples that met online are happier than those who didn’t? These are just some of the most recent statistics from surveys (including a really important one from eHarmony) and studies about online dating that ran in a recent USA Today article.
My friend, Jeannie Assimos, is the Director of Content at eHarmony and has some really interesting tips (from interviews she did with eHarmony success couples) to share about online dating:
1. Make sure you are ready to commit. If you are, then you need to commit to eHarmony (or other online dating site) as well. Translation: Be patient with the process, and it will pay off. You are looking for lifetime love, and this isn’t something that usually happens overnight.
The amount of time it took before these couples met really varied – for some it was only two weeks, for others, two or four months. One guy even stayed on the site for two years until he met his now-wife. And he told me it was absolutely worth it. But every single one of them mentioned patience as an absolute must.
2. Be completely honest when filling out the questionnaire and profile. One woman told Jeannie she wasn’t getting matches she thought were a fit for her initially. She remembered that when she filled out the questionnaire, she wasn’t in a great mood. So she called customer care at eHarmony and requested that she take it over again. She did, and met her now-husband a month later on the site.
3. Know what you are looking for. One man said he considered all of his past relationships and actually wrote down the things he liked about the women he had dated, and what qualities were not a fit for him. This helped him clarify what he wanted. He then made a list of the values and character he wanted in his partner. The key here is that he got totally clear about what was going to work for him and created his intention. He met his now-wife on eHarmony about four months later.
4. Look at what you have to offer and make sure you feel good about yourself.Norman shared that he went onto eHarmony twice. The first time he wasn’t really in a good place – not happy with himself in many areas, emotionally or physically. When he asked himself what he had to offer someone else and the answer was, “not much,” he left the site and took about two years to get his life together and achieve some personal goals. He then returned and was connected with his gorgeous wife.
5. Keep coming back! As one guy put it, “Sometimes it’s just the wrong time of year, the wrong season, or you have hit a dry spell. Come back to it later. I just put it down and came back to it.” His third time on eHarmony turned out to, in fact, be the charm – he finally met his wife.
The overall takeaway for Jeannie was that all of these couples were absolutely ready to find a lifelong partner. They didn’t half-ass it. They all put a lot of thought, time and energy into the whole process, and understood that being patient and having a positive attitude was necessary. They were also self-reflective and aware of what they were looking for, wanting to be sure that they had something to bring to the table as well. It wasn’t all about what someone else had to offer them.
Now, I realize that some of you are a little apprehensive about online dating, or have had bad experiences in the past, but think of it this way….we’ve all had some really negative experiences at work but that doesn’t stop us from finding another job and being productive. Maybe now is the time to try again….
Wishing you love, laughter, and magical kisses!