Happy Money and LOVE

You may already know this…. the #1 source of conflict in marriages and the biggest cause of divorce is money.

Why?

According to my dear friend, Ken Honda, author of Happy Money: The Japanese Art of Making Peace with Your Money, it doesn’t have to be this way.

Ken is a bestselling author (over 7 million books sold around the world!) who has spent years helping the people of Japan heal their relationships with money and become more abundant and peaceful.

Why is money such a big issue in relationships?

According to Ken it’s as if you & your beloved grew up in different countries when it comes to how to handle money.

Universally there is almost always a “spender” and a “saver” with every couple and that leads to making your partner bad and wrong because they do money differently than you do.

Fortunately, he has solutions to bring happiness and harmony to the family finances.

One of the fascinating things I have learned from Ken is that some money “smiles” while other money “cries!” There really is such a thing as Happy Money.

In his book he explains how to have a Happy Money mindset, how to cultivate a loving relationship with money, and why spending money on good food, art and luxury items will make you more abundant.

If you would like to have Happy Money, click here.

Wishing you love, laughter and Happy Money!

Arielle

Is it time to Scare Yourself?

I am in the midst of a new project, something I’ve never attempted before, and I’ve been keeping a journal of the process. I promise to share all about it at that right time but for today here’s what I want you to know.

Over the weekend I read my journal and I had forgotten how absolutely terrified I was when I began it.

My first journal entry revealed that I was sick with nerves and severe anxiety as I began this project. I was filled with self-doubt and fear of failing. At one point I felt like I would pass out just thinking about the enormity of what I was committing to while having thoughts such as:

“Who am I to attempt this?”

‘”I don’t know how to do this.”

“I’m not smart enough to do this.”

“No one will ever be interested in this project.”

“I’ll end up looking like such as loser for attempting this.”

These and many other negative thoughts consumed my monkey mind, initially.

But, I didn’t let it stop me.

Now I am giddy and inspired by my project. I am so happy and excited that I tackled it, in spite of my early trepidation. I think this project could end up as my greatest achievement at some point.

What is stopping you from your next grand achievement?

In the words of the late, great Dr. Susan Jeffers, “feel the fear and do it anyway!”

Wishing you love, laughter and magical kisses,

Arielle

The Fastest Path to Loving Yourself More

Unless you are in a dark place of self-loathing (in which case please find a professional counselor to help you work through it), I know that the fastest way to love yourself more is to be in a healthy, happy, love relationship.

I have come across so many people who tell me that they are “working” on loving themselves, and once they do THEN, they will begin dating.”

I believe you can do both at the same time.

The good news is that working on yourself is a great thing and you can find strategies to be more loving and kind and accepting of yourself and you need to know that the critical voice in your head can be lessened but folks, honestly, you’re never going to eliminate it entirely.

All of us mere mortals have a voice that doubts us from time to time. And it’s normal. Even super famous celebrities do.

Oprah once said that at the end of EVERY interview she has done, whether it was Beyonce or Obama, all asked her the same, “Was that ok?”

Please stop waiting for love.

When you find your beloved, and you see how much love they have for you shining forth from their eyes, there is nothing more healing than that.

As Harville Hendrix teachers, the purpose of soulmate love is for the deepest healing of your core wounds.

And, if you need support in manifesting the love of your life, please listen to my free 90-minute webinar (with Feminine Power creator Claire Zammit) at www.soulmatepassion44.com
Wishing you love, laughter and magical kisses,

Arielle

How to BE with NOT KNOWING

One of the first things I learned in Journalism school is the importance to provide the Who, What, When, Where, and How in every story.

As someone who always wanted to know all of those things, especially when I am trying to make BIG decisions and choices in my life, learning how to BE with NOT KNOWING changed my life.

Once I realized it was impossible to always know what to do and how to be, I figured out a few things that made my life easier.=-

#1 Eventually, I would find an answer and until then I can “trust” that this will happen and I can be less stressed in the in-between time.

#2 Just because what I “want” isn’t happening, doesn’t mean something great isn’t on the way, and most of the time something bigger and better occurs.

#3 Life experience has shown me that some of the worst things I’ve ever experienced turned out to be the best because they got me to places I couldn’t even imagine existed.

Life is a mystery and there are factors influencing us that we can’t really ‘know,” such as karma and divine timing.

I’ve learned to stay both in action with my desires and to also simultaneously stay surrendered and detached from the outcome. It requires staying aware and present and most days it keeps me sane.
Wishing you love, laughter and magical kisses,

Arielle

P.S. Last Chance: If manifesting a soulmate is your priority, then I invite you to my last weekend workshop of the year at the breathtakingly beautiful Esalen, May 8-10.

Details here.

How Many ”I Love You’s” Is Too Much?

Can your soulmate ever say “I Love You” too often?

I doubt it.

Of course, you first need a warm, loving, awesome soulmate to find out.

For those of you fortunate ones who are living life with your soulmate, challenge yourself to UP your love sharing.

Use every opportunity to tell them how much love and appreciate them, (and chances are once you start the process, they will follow along and share more love with you).

Get creative.

Tuck a little “I Love You” post-it note into their purse or pocket.


Or put it behind the sun visor in their car, under their pillow, on the bathroom mirror, so that it’s the first thing they see in the morning or send a middle of the day text or email.

I don’t have any scientific studies on this but I’ll bet saying” I Love You” more often is also great for your lovers health…boosting their immune system and creating more feel-good hormones in their body.

If you come up with some fun and creative ways to say “I Love You,” please let me know and I will share them here in a future newsletter.

Wishing you love, laughter, and magical kisses,

Arielle

P.S. If manifesting a soulmate is your priority, then I invite you to my last weekend workshop of the year at the breathtakingly beautiful Esalen the weekend of May 8-10. Details for both here: https://www.arielleford.com/events/

How to Have MORE, better SEX (at any age)

On my most recent episode of BIG LOVE PODCAST, my special guest is sexpert, Susan Bratton.

Known as the trusted hot sex advisor to millions,™  Susan is a walking, talking brain trust on everything from how to more, better sex at any age to how & why money impacts your sex life.

We had a blasting talking about:

Communication skills for discussing sex with your mate, even when you’ve been together for decades.

How to train your partner to be a great lover without insulting them.

Why men should never use antibacterial mouthwash (it causes erectile dysfunction!)

The newest and best sex toys for couples (some of these sound like so much fun!)

The Platinum Rule every couple should follow.

Why she adamantly opposes pornography.

The cutting edge lasers for vaginal and penis rejuvenation and so much more!

Susan is offering a terrific free gift to you called The Sexual Soulmate Pact at www.susanbratton.com/arielle.

And you can listen to us here

Wishing you love, laughter and magical kisses,

 Arielle

P.S. If manifesting a soulmate is your priority, then I invite you for the only two LIVE in person events I am doing this year.

I will be in Chicago at the Infinity Foundation for a one-day workshop on

Saturday, April 27th  and I will be teaching at the breathtakingly beautiful

Esalen the weekend of May 8-10. Details for both here: https://www.arielleford.com/events/

 

Be A LOVE Plusser (here’s how!)

I recently attended a creativity workshop taught by famed artist and animator, Dave Zoboski (link to www.TheAlchemyofCreativity.com ). He spent decades working as a Senior Animator at Disney, Sony and Warner Brothers.

We all were given colored pencils and a sketchpad while Dave’s model posed for us.  Most of us didn’t have any real artistic ability in this field, but we were encouraged to have fun and go for it.

After several minutes of sketching, he told us to stop and to put our pad on our chair and to move three seats to our left and then pick up the pad on that chair and begin sketching on someone else drawing.   The assignment was to see how we could improve upon what they had already begun.

Dave explained that in the animation field, the culture is such that you never criticize another artists’ work, but rather you become a “plusser” for them …someone who adds to and improves the work they have done so far.

I fell in love with this idea and began thinking about how wonderful it would be if we all declared ourselves “plussers” in love, and gave up being “judgy” thus committing ourselves to contributing to those around us in ways that are positive,  uplifting, and kind.

For whom will you be a love plusser?

Wishing you love, laughter and magical kisses,

 

Arielle

P.S. If manifesting a soulmate is your priority, then I invite you for the only two LIVE in person events I am doing this year.

I will be in Chicago at the Infinity Foundation for a one-day workshop on

Saturday, April 27th  and I will be teaching at the breathtakingly beautiful

Esalen the weekend of May 8-10. Details for both here: https://www.arielleford.com/events/

The Difference Between Manifestation and Magical Thinking

Magical Thinking is something children do naturally and it’s a fun process for them. Believing in Santa Claus is a good example. But when we grow up and mature, engaging in magical thinking will often lead to frustration and disappointment.

Magical Thinking is “wishing” to win the lottery but never buying a ticket.

Magical Thinking is “wishing” for a better job or a new career but never taking real action steps to make it happen.

Our great-niece, Grace.

Magical Thinking is saying you want to write a book but never sitting down to write.

Magical Thinking is hoping you will meet and marry your soulmate “organically,” or wishing and dreaming that one-click Amazon will deliver him or her to your doorstep.

Is it time for you to give up your Magical Thinking and put one of your dreams into action?

If you said yes, here’s a fast 3-step approach to get started.

#1 Make a commitment, for the next week to take 5 baby steps each day towards making your dream come true.

#2 Enroll a friend to be your accountability partner and make a plan to connect daily for that week so they can hold you to your word to do the 5 daily things.

#3 Take time each day to sit in nature and feel what it feels like to have accomplished manifesting your dream.

And, if manifesting a soulmate is your priority, then I invite you for the only two LIVE in person events I am doing this year.

I will be in Chicago at the Infinity Foundation for a one-day workshop on

Saturday, April 27th  and I will be teaching at the breathtakingly beautiful

Esalen the weekend of  May 8-10. Details for both here: https://www.arielleford.com/events/

 

Wishing you love, laughter and magical kisses,

 

Arielle

 

What Law & Order Taught Me About Love

One of my favorite TV series of the last 20 years is Law and Order. I avidly watch all of the various versions of the show and often fall asleep to re-runs! I’m always impressed with how the defense attorneys stand up for their unlikable clients, working hard to prove that one is “innocent until proven guilty.”

Recently Brian was admonishing me, for the millionth time, about leaving crumbs on the kitchen counter. This has been going on forever.
I just don’t see crumbs!

He told me (again) how the crumbs attract ants (also an ongoing issue).
My first reaction (as usual) was to get defensive thinking, “it’s just a few ants.”
But then I thought, what if I had to defend Brian’s reaction and really stand up for him and make a case for why he was right???

So, I put on my defense counselor hat and argued to myself, “well of course he doesn’t want to attract ants because he doesn’t want to kill anything, not even an ant!” (FYI, he regularly rescues little critters like when I find a Daddy Longlegs in the bathtub).
Arguing on his behalf I said to myself,
“Doesn’t it make sense to not cause any additional ants to come into the open where they will most certainly be killed?”

Verdict: he’s innocent.

I recommend you try this Law & Order approach the next time anyone triggers a negative reaction in you. The BIG exception to this is if they are doing something really bad, or illegal, or they are abusing you in anyway, or in active addiction, then this approach is not for you. (And remember this is why God invented trained professionals to help you work through the tough stuff.)

Wishing you love, laughter and magical kisses,

Arielle
P.S. Meet Me in Chicago or Big Sur, CA– I will be in Chicago at the Infinity Foundation for The Soulmate Secret LIVE workshop Saturday, April 27th and I will be teaching at the breathtakingly beautiful Esalen weekend of May 8-10. Details here: https://www.arielleford.com/events/

Before You React, Reflect!

This morning I came across a colleagues name and that reminded me that she had not responded to my last three emails, which were requests for assistance on something that she easily could have said no to.  I felt myself getting angry, and feeling dissed, and then my imagination began thinking up ways to trick her into responding just to prove that my emails were going through and she was purposely not responding.

Instead of doing something hurtful, I did some tapping, some breathing, and then I got the message below from my friend Madisyn Taylor of DailyOm.   This was exactly what I needed to be reminded of, just at the right moment, so thought I  would share it with all of you:

 “We have all had the experience of reacting in a way that was less than ideal upon hearing bad news, or being unfairly criticized, or being told something we did not want to hear. This makes sense because when our emotions are triggered, they tend to take center stage, inhibiting our ability to pause before we speak. We may feel compelled to release the tension by expressing ourselves in some way, whether it’s yelling back at the person yelling at us, or rushing to deliver words of comfort to a friend in trouble. However, there is much to be said for teaching ourselves to remember to pause and take a deep breath before we respond to the shocks and insults that can come our way in life.

For one thing, our initial response is not always what’s best for us, or for the other people involved. Reacting to childish rage with childish rage will only escalate the negativity in a situation, further ensnaring us in an undesirable dynamic. Similarly, when we react defensively, or simply thoughtlessly, we often end up feeling regret over our words or actions. In the end, we save ourselves a lot of pain when we take a deep breath and really tune in to ourselves, and the other person, before we respond. This doesn’t necessarily mean we don’t say anything, although in some cases, that may be the best option.

Some situations require a fairly immediate response, but even just a moment of grounding ourselves before we do so can help enormously. The next time you find yourself wanting to react, try to pause, and in that pause, take a deep breath. Feel your feet on the floor, the air on your skin, and listen for a response to arise within you, rather than just going with the first thing that pops into your head. You may find that in that moment, there is the potential to move beyond reaction and into the more subtle and creative realm of response, where something new can happen.”

If you would like more wisdom from Madisyn Taylor, know that she is a Billboard recording artist and international best-selling author and co-founder and editor-in-chief of the popular inspirational website www.DailyOM.com responsible for all its content. Her newest award-winning book from Simon & Schuster is: Unmedicated The Four Pillars of Natural Wellness which documents her journey through anxiety and depression and how she became whole again.

Wishing you love, laughter and magical kisses,

 Arielle

P.S. Meet Me in Chicago or Big Sur, CA– I will be in Chicago at the Infinity Foundation for The Soulmate Secret LIVE workshop Saturday, April 27th  and I will be teaching at the breathtakingly beautiful Esalen weekend of  May 8-10. Details here: https://www.arielleford.com/events/