Tag Archives: negative thinking

What Law & Order Taught Me About Love

Posted by Apr 2, 2019 , , , , , , , , Leave a Comment

One of my favorite TV series of the last 20 years is Law and Order. I avidly watch all of the various versions of the show and often fall asleep to re-runs! I’m always impressed with how the defense attorneys stand up for their unlikable clients, working hard to prove that one is “innocent until proven guilty.”

Recently Brian was admonishing me, for the millionth time, about leaving crumbs on the kitchen counter. This has been going on forever.
I just don’t see crumbs!

He told me (again) how the crumbs attract ants (also an ongoing issue).
My first reaction (as usual) was to get defensive thinking, “it’s just a few ants.”
But then I thought, what if I had to defend Brian’s reaction and really stand up for him and make a case for why he was right???

So, I put on my defense counselor hat and argued to myself, “well of course he doesn’t want to attract ants because he doesn’t want to kill anything, not even an ant!” (FYI, he regularly rescues little critters like when I find a Daddy Longlegs in the bathtub).
Arguing on his behalf I said to myself,
“Doesn’t it make sense to not cause any additional ants to come into the open where they will most certainly be killed?”

Verdict: he’s innocent.

I recommend you try this Law & Order approach the next time anyone triggers a negative reaction in you. The BIG exception to this is if they are doing something really bad, or illegal, or they are abusing you in anyway, or in active addiction, then this approach is not for you. (And remember this is why God invented trained professionals to help you work through the tough stuff.)

Wishing you love, laughter and magical kisses,

Arielle
P.S. Meet Me in Chicago or Big Sur, CA– I will be in Chicago at the Infinity Foundation for The Soulmate Secret LIVE workshop Saturday, April 27th and I will be teaching at the breathtakingly beautiful Esalen weekend of May 8-10. Details here: https://www.arielleford.com/events/

How? The one word that stifles manifestation

Posted by Aug 14, 2018 , , , Leave a Comment

Someone asked me today what my “secret” to manifesting is, and quite simply the answer is “I remember that at the quantum level what I’ve asked for IS already mine.”

In the “field” we are ALREADY connected to that which we desire.

When you spend your time in a state of deep gratitude, for whatever it is that you seek, you are affirming and living as if in such a way that it manifests more quickly into the 3-D world.

On the other hand, if your monkey mind is asking “but HOW will this happen,” that question has the underlying thinking that if you knew HOW, then you could be ASSURED of its arrival. By asking how, you are affirming that IT doesn’t exist or isn’t possible for you.

You do NOT need to know how, or when, or where your dream will come true.

Hint: It’s coming from wherever it is right now.

You do need to trust the Universe, have faith in the process, and manage your monkey mind when it wants to discourage you.

One way to do this is to give your Monkey Mind a name.

It could be Negative and Nasty Nancy, or Mr. No Possibility, or Mrs. Full of Doubt and Discouragement.

Then create a special journal to give this negative voice a place to vent, thank it for sharing, and then be sure to counter his/her argument with your TRUTH.

And remember, that there is Divine Timing at work, so just because you can’t “see it” yet, doesn’t mean it’s not already there.

Wishing you love, laughter, and magical kisses,

Arielle

Be A Badass!

Posted by Sep 27, 2016 , , , Leave a Comment

When I was growing up, we had the term “badass,” but it was usually the bully in school who was always in detention, or even worse, sent to military school because he couldn’t get along with the other kids.

Today, Badass has a whole new meaning, especially for women, and my friend Nikki Jade defines it this way:

1) Someone who doesn’t care what other people think of them because they are authentically, boldly and freely expressing their beautiful divine self.

2) They create their life moment by moment on the basis of what they would love.

3) They are so powerful they must watch every thought and choose wisely.

4) An empowered goddess.

I love this definition and I think it provides a great template for living a life filled with love, prosperity, satisfaction and fun.

badassery

So, what does it take to live authentically and boldly?  Courage!  Allow yourself to be fully YOU.  Allow others to see you, and while that can be scary, follow the lead of the late, great Susan Jeffers and “feel the fear and do it anyway.”

Creating your life moment by moment requires that you first get to dig deep and really know what makes you happy and what you love. One way to do this is to make a list of times and experiences in your past where you experienced true joy. Then do MORE of that!

Now, the hard part:  The Law of Attraction is ALWAYS working, which is why you must learn to manage your thoughts, feelings and emotions. You are a very powerful being and what you put your attention on grows.  If you are stuck in negative emotions or thought forms, you are not creating the life you desire.  This is not to say that you don’t honor and process negative emotions, you must; but learn how to do that so you don’t find yourself in negative feedback loops that keep you stuck.

Remember…. choose every thought wisely.

Now go out there and be the fabulous Badass that you are!

Wishing you love, laughter, and magical kisses,

 Arielle

P.S.  If you want to be a Badass in love and when it comes to manifesting your soulmate, join Claire Zammit and I for:

The 7 Myths Keeping You From Love
LIVE Seminar this Thursday,  September 29th
Register Here at No Charge

Single and Blue at Christmas? Here’s What to Do….

Posted by Dec 21, 2011 , Leave a Comment

Single for the holidays?

Feeling down about it?

Trying to talk yourself out of your feelings?

We live in a world that is forever preaching to us to be upbeat, optimistic and have positive thoughts.

I disagree.

Some times we have to allow ourselves to simply feel what we are feeling. To deny, ignore, or suppress our true feelings doesn’t make these feelings go away and can actually make us sick on some level.

Here’s what I do when I am experiencing negative emotions.

First, identify the feeling. Is it sadness? anger? resentment? disappointment? Then I give myself full permission, for 3 minutes, to completely dive into my thoughts and feelings and I do my best to stay totally focused on the emotion. (no happy thoughts allowed!)

Next, I take out my journal and write down in detail my experience, including a description of my expectations that aren’t currently being met. I then check to see if there are any other feelings bubbling up that are asking to be felt, and if so, I repeat the process.

Finally, I make a gratitude list of all the things, large and small, that I am grateful for. My list often begins with items such as:

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