More than thirty years ago I had the extraordinary good fortune to meet Herb Tanzer and Elizabeth Goodman.
I was attending the Landmark Forum and Herb was our awesome, amazing and brilliant leader.
Throughout the weekend workshop he often gushed about how much he loved his beautiful wife, Elizabeth.
Herb & Elizabeth were really my first introduction into what a true soulmate relationship looks like.
Together they were adoring, devoted, playful, funny and clearly meant to be together.
After 38 years of loving each other, Herb passed a year ago from cancer.
Of course, Elizabeth was devastated to lose her best friend, life partner and soulmate.
Toward the end of his life, they had several deep conversations in which Herb shared with Elizabeth that she needed to “pay attention.” He wanted her to be open to finding someone to take care of her after he was gone.
Elizabeth always insisted she could take care of herself. Herb repeatedly told her to “pay attention.”
One of Herb’s closest friends was another Forum leader named Garry.
He was a recent widower. His wife of 55 years, Donna, had passed less than a year before Herb. The four of them had been friends for 35 years and had vacationed together.
Towards the end of Herb’s life, he and Garry spoke frequently, while Elizabeth and Garry also spoke to console each other.
Garry shared with her that Donna had told him many times that she didn’t want him to be alone after she was gone, she asked him to please be open to finding love again.
Neither Garry or Elizabeth ever dreamed that they would find love again, certainly not with each other, but that is exactly what has happened. (they “paid attention” to the feelings growing between them as they both navigated their grief.)
Garry and Elizabeth had both experienced Big Love, great love, soulmate love, and then, thanks to their departing soulmates setting the stage, planting seeds and magic, they have now fallen in love.
In this new relationship they have the freedom to express their love and grief as well as celebrate this new love and joy with the knowledge that their soulmates on the other side are cheering them on.
While some people think they fell in love “too soon” after their losses, the truth is the human heart is big enough to give and receive unlimited love. Their new love for each other doesn’t take anything away from the love they still share with their loves on the other side.
I couldn’t be happier for them!
Wishing you love, laughter and magical kisses,