How To Trust Your Intuition

It took me years to learn to trust my intuition.  Sometimes it was hard to distinguish between my “wishful thinking” and a real intuitive “hit.”

 

imagesMy friend and intuitive extraordinaire, Colette Baron Reid, shared with me a very simple but powerful technique to use by yourself when you need to access your own intuition. She calls it the YES OR NO technique.

 

To begin you say your name out loud.  For example: “My name is Arielle.”

 

Then notice how that feels in your body. When I say “My name is Arielle” I get this very clear “solid” feeling that YES this is absolutely true.

 

Then make the same statement but with a false name, such as “My name is Violet.”

 

You will notice that this feels both confusing and wrong.

 

The next step is to ask the question you most want the answer to…. if you are trying to figure out if the person you have been dating for awhile is the “one,”  or if a potential opportunity is a good thing try this:

 

“Is ____the one for me?”

 

Or you can say,

 

“Is it in my highest and best good to pursue _____ with ________?”

 

Rev-arms-outIf you feel contracted around your chest area, this is a sign that your body is giving you a “no.” If you are hoping that this person is the right person and you find that you are getting a NO and you see that you are trying to re-work the question to get a “yes” and you are feeling obsessed, or disappointed in how your body is responding, this is how you know the difference between intuition and wishful thinking.

 

To know the difference between intuition and wishful thinking, pay attention to how you feel and what you’re trying to do with the information. If you’re letting it “be” whatever it is, then you’re getting intuitive guidance. If you’re trying to direct or manipulate the action or outcome with a particular agenda, or if you are afraid or feeling fearful about what you are feeling, then you might be in the realm of wishful thinking. It may take a little practice but developing your inner radar will serve you well.

 

And, if you want to really dive into this, check out Colette’s Daily Oracle Card Reading Course. This is a 3-Lesson online course to help you get in touch with the best adviser you’ll ever have – Spirit. It teaches you the fundamentals of dialoguing with Spirit on a daily basis to help you adjust your actions or interpretations of events, people, and overall challenges. Amazing resource!

 

Wishing you love, laughter, and magical kisses,

Arielle

The Real Purpose of Marriage

 

My sister Debbie loved her rabbi, Baruch Ezagui. One day, the Rabbi and I had a conversation about love and the real meaning of marriage. He told me he believes “marriage is the highest calling of humankind” and that it includes the marriage between the body and soul, heaven and earth, spirit and matter, one human and another.

He further explained:

“This union of beings is reflected in the marriage between men and women. True love is loving the person for what they love, who they are, for what they stand for. If you go into a marriage loving what you love, not what they love, that is not real love.

Real love is not finding someone to hold your hand and find common ground with; the institution of marriage is to push you out of your comfort zone, lift you up and above what you need, so that you can provide what you are needed for.

WOW.

Just ponder that last bit: marriage… lifts you up above what you need, so that you can provide what you are needed for.

For those of you who are wary of marriage or fearful that your past history is a precursor of your future, I urge you to consider the true nature of marriage and a soulmate relationship, which I believe is that it brings us not only great joy, but also the deepest possible level of healing.

Wishing you love, laughter, and magical kisses,

Arielle

Do You TRUST the Universe?

Shit happens.

It just does.

We have good days, bad days, and mediocre days.

One day we feel great…top of the world.

The next day we feel like crap, get in a car accident, or worse.

Life is great. Life sucks.

This is just how it is……one step forward, two steps back.
Keep Calm and Trust the UniverseSo…here’s the BIG question: Why do so many of us live as if feeling bad is so WRONG?

I think there are two answers to this question:

#1 is that we were raised on the old Alka Seltzer jingle “plop, plop, fizz, fizz, oh what a relief it is.” We’re programmed to believe that there is a pill to pop to alleviate every pain or discomfort. (Even though we all know that physical pain is a necessary signal that something is calling for our attention.)

#2 we don’t believe that the Universe always has our back. Quite simply, we don’t trust God. We assume that whatever is happening…whether it’s the loss of a job, heartbreak, illness, betrayal, unexpected money issues, or roadblocks to our heart’s desires… we take it as a sign that we are doomed and more bad is on the way.

While just like everyone else I would rather avoid pain, in six decades on this planet, I’ve discovered that my greatest, most extraordinary “wins” in life have all come as a result of my most painful and difficult experiences. Over time I’ve learned to cultivate trust in the Universe.

As I began to witness in my own life that from the darkest times came the brightest results, I found the ability to trust both God and myself. I consciously sought out proof that the bad times were the soil in which my dreams came to fruition. (And yes, I admit, that I often wished for a genie in a bottle to make it all easier for me.)

If you are having a great day today, take a few moments to close your eyes, drop into your heart and really feel how grateful you are.  Deeply breathe in this gratitude and savor it.

And, if today is a bad day, close your eyes, drop into your heart, and take a few moments to feel what you are truly feeling….and then see if you can conjure up true gratitude for the possibility of the most wonderful thing that will soon come to you as a result of this difficulty.

Wishing you love, laughter, and magical kisses,

Arielle

What Do You Want?

I don’t always get what I want.

 

UnknownAfter 30 years of studying and excelling at the Law of Attraction, and even though I am considered a “master manifestor,” sometimes there is a conflict between what I say or think I want and what I end up with.

 

Why is this?

 

Just having the desire for something isn’t enough to make it so, and…. sometimes I don’t put the kind of attention and action into manifesting that I know it takes to make something happen.

 

For instance, I often “want” to lose some weight.  I think about it, but the truth is, I have not seriously done anything about it.  I just keep hoping the excess pounds will “magically” disappear or I make up all kinds of excuses as why I can’t do it.

 

We all do this…..

 

My current thought about this is simply:  Either I make a commitment to that which I say I desire, then make a plan and get into action, or stop deluding myself into thinking I really “want” that thing, whatever it is.

 

I call this moving an item from “the bucket list” to “the F$%k It” list.

 

By taking an item off the list, I free myself up to focus on what my heart and soul is most calling for.

 

IF you are on the “fence” about whether or not you truly desire something, ask yourself this:

 

What feeling do I expect to experience when I get _____?

Then ask yourself, am I willing o do what it takes to have this feeling?

Or, is there something else that will get me to the desired feeling?

 

The answer should then become clear.

 

Once you know what your soul is truly calling for, remember that on the “unseen level” it’s already yours and then make an enthusiastic plan to “claim it in the 3-D world!”

 

Wishing you love, laughter, and magical kisses,

Arielle

MORE of You Are Enough, I Am Enough

Of all the newsletters I’ve ever written, the recent one about “being enough” has gotten the most response.  I was so surprised to learn that this is such a big issue for so many people (including me).

Did you know that this is an actual “phobia”?  It’s called Atelophobia – it’s the fear of imperfection and of not being good enough. There are now drugs to deal with the anxiety caused by this – oy vey!

This craving to be “enough” stems from the stories we make up about ourselves and the messages we get from society.  Early on we learn that if we act a particular way, get  good grades in school, win at sports, or give hugs to crazy Aunt Sophie, we receive praise from those around us.  We get “attention” and we begin to connect “love” with “actions.”

I Am Enough

Many of us have learned to believe that “I am enough when I do ___________.”

And, really, the truth is just our very beingness makes us more than enough.

Now, it’s up to us, as mature adults, to begin to make this a practice when the negative chatter in our head preaches that we need to do more, do better, etc. When I look at my cat, I never think, “If only Yoda would do ______ then I would love him more.” I love Yoda just because he is alive and with us (and it’s possible Yoda doesn’t share this point of view and he might love me more if I spoiled him as much as Brian does…ha ha!).

Writer/blogger Alexandra Hope Flood offers 11 steps to reminding us all that we are ENOUGH:

1. You are a miracle. Never forget this fact. Just the science alone is mind blowing.

2. You are unique. No one will ever be as good at being you as you are. Seriously.

3. You are enough. Always. Never doubt this. There is nothing to add, but feel free to expand.

4. There is always more to learn, but that is not failure, it is a gift. It can be fun too.

5. Every obstacle is an opportunity to fall further into the miracle that is you.

6. Commit to being the best version of you every day. Recalibrate the definition of “best” as needed.

7. Leave room for others when they fall off the wagon of their own miracle.

8. Forgive. Forgive. Forgive. Forgive every which way. Forgive him. Forgive her. Forgive you.

9. Compassion is the key to forgiveness. Compassion means you feel the humanity in others.

10. The more you forgive, the more you’ll enjoy being you, because the lighter your load will be.

11. In the end, as in the beginning: You. Are. Amazing.

One of my favorite lines is from the classic film, The Help (starring Viola Davis, Octavia Spencer & Jessica Chastain).  Everyday, the maid tells the little girl in her care:

“You is kind. You is smart. You is important.”

Remember this!

Wishing you love, laughter and magical kisses,

 Arielle

It’s TONIGHT!!!!

I never intended to become a love and relationship expert.

 

If you had told me ten years ago I would end up here, I would have said you were crazy!

 

And yet, the Universe had a plan for me and I am super-grateful on how my life has unfolded.

 

My mission is simply to provide all those who are seeking a soulmate, and also give to those who want to grow and sustain a relationship, all of the best available information on the planet. Besides writing books and teaching workshops, every year I have the awesome pleasure of creating a free, online event!

 

My 6th annual Art of Love Series starts today at 5 pm PT / 8 pm ETand I couldn’t be more excited. This year the Series is targeted for SINGLES and it’s a free event bringing together the world’s top love, dating & mating experts who share EVERYTHING about how and where to find all the great, conscious people out there who are also looking for you!

 

I promise you there is content here you have NEVER heard before, the knowing of which will skyrocket you into love. Claire Zammit and I will kick it off LIVE today (with Marianne Williamson!) at 5 pm PT / 8 pm ET. 

 

Sign up now!

1200x628 Banner-Arielle Ford

 

 

MEN – while the target audience is women, below are just some of the sessions that apply to BOTH men & women:

  • Deepak Chopra – Activating Synchrodestiny To Attract Soul Love
  • Attached! With Dr. Amir Levine who has groundbreaking work on attachment styles…learn how to “spot” the ones who can truly commit, quickly!
  • Orna and Matthew Walters on now to Become Magnetic to Your Soulmate
  • How To Release Your Love Blocks & Burn Your Baggage
  • Two workshops on online dating that supply the secrets to success and making it a fun & sacred process. (1 in 3 marriages now start online).
  • Marci Shimoff on “Unlocking the Magnetic Power of Self-Love and Happiness”
  • Accessing Mystical Love with your Angels and Numerology with Sunny Dawn Johnston and Glynis McCants….AND MORE!

 

Sign up for free right now at THE ART OF LOVE!

 

Wishing you love, laughter and magical kisses,

Arielle

 

P.S. If you are ‘waiting” for the right time to start dating, please remember that who you are RIGHT NOW is enough!  AND, if you miss us LIVE, register anyway and we will send you the replay link.

Love As An Art Form

Love is an art and you are the artist.

How, when, and where you express your love is your medium.

Your words and deeds can light up someone’s day or toss them into the depths of despair.

Love is much more than just a feeling.

Original art by www.sharronkatz.com

Original art by www.sharronkatz.com

So many of us depend on our feelings to tell us if we are “loving” someone.

The truth about love is that it is an action.

Love is a choice.

Love is a connection.

Love is a decision.

Love is a practice.

Love is a behavior.

Love is the juiciest part of life.

Love opens our hearts, expands our world and brings a smile to our lips.

For love, we make commitments and agreements to share our life with another.

When we pledge our love to another we say to them:

I will love you on your good days and your bad days.

 I will be your safe place to land.

 I will share with you my attention, affection, and appreciation.

Love is as much about giving as it is about receiving.

It’s about being willing to forgive and love is also about truth-telling.

And it’s about loving yourself.

Love is God.

Love is WHO we are.

Love is why we are here.

And in the end, love is an art and you are the artist.

How, where, and when you express, share, and shower your love onto the world (and yourself) will be your legacy and your masterpiece.

Wishing you love, laughter, and magical kisses,

 Arielle

You Are Enough. I am Enough.

It seems like nearly everyone I know is in the midst of a physical and emotional transformation, myself included. Symptoms range from serious challenges (cancer, Lyme disease, etc.) to very annoying (but not life-threatening) things like chronic headaches, vertigo, reflux, food sensitivities, parasites, blood flow, sleeplessness, etc.).

 

As I deal with my own issues, while having spent thousands of dollars during the past five years on western, eastern medical treatments, woo-woo energetic healings, medical intuitives, EFT release techniques, herbs, aromatherapy, homeopathic remedies, flower remedies, cleanses, acupuncture, vitamins, consultants and just about anything else you can dream up, my chronic conditions are still there.  Every treatment helps a little, but is not a cure.

 

Looking into my own psyche and observing my friends in the same boat, I see a pattern:  We are all very driven creatives who enjoy producing results, making a difference in the world. That is the “outer” part of it.

 

findloveGoing deeper, it’s clear that we are also trying, sometimes desperately, to fill up parts of our soul.  Seeking love in the form of our success.  The way we fill these holes is different with each of us.  Certainly ego plays a big role.  My identity is still tied to my outer abilities.

 

Busyness is also a big piece of this.  I recently diagnosed myself with what I call “chronic shpilkes.”   Shpilkes is a Yiddish word that means having “ants in your pants.” It also means impatience and agitation. You might also call it an “adrenalin addiction.”

 

While my soul is clearly screaming for a kinder, gentler, more peaceful day-to-day existence, and while my mind knows, believes, and understands that I can “do less and accomplish more,” the reality is that I often am still in overdoing mode.

 

As are my friends.

 

Here’s what I know for sure about this:

 

It’s not about having “more.”

 

It’s not about having more organic juices, more yoga classes, more money, more results, more success, more books, more sex, more this or more that.

 

It’s about really, truly getting to enough.

 

I am enough.

 

You are enough.

 

I now see that nobody out there has the “cure” to my issue because nothing is wrong. This is my journey to figure out.

 

The question that I am now sitting with is:

 

What will it take for me to get to knowing and being that I am enough?

 

Wishing you love, laughter and magical kisses,

 

Arielle

A Love Manifesto

More than 25 years ago, my therapist held a mirror in front of my face and asked me to look into my own eyes and say the words “I Love You.”

I was instantly engulfed in a wave of sadness and despair and whispered, “I can’t do that, it would be a lie.” He was kind and patient and urged me just to try it. Every time I tried to say it, I just cried harder. Eventually, I managed to mouth the words, but still it felt inauthentic….

imagesThat began a long, slow process of learning to love myself. The process of letting go of decades of self-loathing and self-doubt was hard. Painful, and yet totally worth it.

So often people ask me “Do I have to love myself in order to have soulmate love?” It’s a tricky question because nearly everyone I know (with or without a soulmate) has levels of self-doubt and insecurity about their worthiness to have love.

Here’s what I know to be absolutely true: 

We all have people that love us, we all have qualities that are very loveable. Even murderers and rapists have redeeming qualities, and yes, we are happy they are behind bars and no longer pose a threat to society.

Learning to love ourselves requires commitment.

A commitment to be an emotionally mature adult so that when we catch ourselves beating ourselves up, we stop, take notice, say “cancel-cancel” and replace those negative thoughts with a true, positive statement about ourselves.

Most of us are living under levels of stress and chaos that are often overwhelming because we allow ourselves to exist with out proper levels of self-care and self-love. I believe the first step to self-care is leaning how to “self-soothe.”

Another important piece of this is to finally stop “shoulding” on your self. You know what I mean, “I should do this and I should do that.” “Shoulding” on your self just creates more dread and stress on an already busy life.

One suggestion I have for you is this:

Create your own emotional tool kit of things you can do to regain your sanity when things go haywire. Figure out what are your best “time-outs” that will get you from crazy to neutral to happy again. My kit contains EFT Tapping, the Sedona Method, doing heart lock-in’s, long aromatherapy baths, walks in nature, and foot rubs. I do some or all of these things nearly every day.

Here’s what I know for sure: You are loved. You are loveable. You are deserving of Big Love, every day. And it all begins with you.

Wishing you love, laughter, and magical kisses,

Arielle

P.S.If you are a single, successful woman seeking a conscious man (or if you have friends that are), then I have a special Spring gift for you – my annual Art of Love Series is coming up. This free, online series is bringing together the world’s top love, dating & mating experts who share EVERYTHING about how and where to find all the great, conscious guys out there who are also looking for you! Sign up for free right now at THE ART OF LOVE!

Be A LOVE Junkie (naturally)

Artwork by www.sharronkatz.com

Artwork by www.sharronkatz.com

Yes, it’s finally Spring – the happy season of birds singing, bees buzzing and people falling madly in love.

Every April your brain unwittingly becomes a dopamine factory, turning you into a love junkie. In fact, brain scans of people flooded with dopamine look a lot like brain scans of drug addicts. Which makes sense, since being high on dopamine feels, as many lovers would put it, euphoric.

My friend, Helen Fisher, a neuroscientist, professor at Rutgers University, and author of five books on the science of love, explains it this way:

“Dopamine is a naturally occurring chemical your brain uses to make you want things. There are other systems involved in love, but when it comes to new love, dopamine is the main culprit. And with enough of it swirling around your system, you’re prone to fall in love — and fall hard.”

So what does this have to do with Spring?

According to Fisher, “dopamine is triggered by novel experiences and there’s so much novelty in the spring…so much more color, new smells, people take their clothes off and you can see more of them. And so there is a lot of new stimuli that triggers the brain and drives up dopamine, and makes you more susceptible to love.”

For those of you lucky enough to already be with your soulmate, use the energy of Spring to try some new and novel things together and take advantage of the Spring dopamine rush! (I am hoping for a hot air balloon experience!)

If you are a single, successful woman seeking a conscious man (or it you have friends that are), then I have a special Spring gift for you – my annual Art of Love Series is coming up. This free, online series is bringing together the world’s top love, dating & mating experts who share EVERYTHING about how and where to find all the great, conscious guys out there who are also looking for you! Sign up for free right now at THE ART OF LOVE.

Wishing you love, laughter and magical kisses,

Arielle