Releasing Negativity

We’ve all been there…..the days when we spiral down convinced that life just isn’t going our way… that we are undeserving of love, or the new job, or the thing we are most wishing for.

imagesOur mind goes into overdrive, some would call it a negative feedback loop, and we keep replaying the negativity over and over again, convinced our mind is telling us the truth.

BUT….just because you have a thought does not mean it’s true!

It’s up to us to begin to manage our thoughts and emotions and there are ways to do this but it requires a little time and attention.

When you find yourself having negative thoughts, try these techniques:

1)  Stop what you are doing and acknowledge to yourself what you are thinking…internally (or out loud) say “cancel-cancel.”

2)  Then take time to do a feelingization (go to www.soulmatesecret.com and scroll down to the Love Magnet video) to move from your monkey mind to your heart and begin to feel love, appreciation and gratitude.  Remember, you attract MORE of what you are grateful for!

3)  Now create a positive affirmation that FEELS GOOD IN YOUR BODY.  Statements such as: I am a kind and loving being or I am grateful for all the love in my life right now.  Whatever statement feels most natural to you.  Write these on post-it notes and place where you can look at them daily.

I want to suggest that those of you who truly, deeply desire a soulmate (or a new career or whatever) that you begin to let go of your doubts of what is possible for you…..remember that the word “impossible” is really “I’m possible.”

One of my favorite quotes in Wayne Dyer’s book, WISHES FULFILLED, is from the great teacher, Neville, who said “Make your future dream a present fact by assuming the feeling of the wish fulfilled.”

I strongly encourage you to write this down and look at it daily. You deserve love and the one you are seeking is ALSO seeking you.

Wishing you love, laughter and magical kisses,

Arielle

Possible Love Turbulence Coming

I was talking to my dear friend Carol Allen, Vedic astrologer extraordinaire, the other day and she shared with me about upcoming planetary conditions that will be affecting a lot of love lives…. I invited her to write this guest blog to shed some light on what to expect:

carol_closeup_400Celestial Storms Ahead – What To Do…

Have you ever been excited to know what astrology can tell you, but scared at the same time?

Your chart might say that guy you like is all wrong for you…

Or that this isn’t your year to find love…

Or that trouble is headed your way…

Who wants to hear that? But it’s exactly for that very reason you SHOULD consult the stars.

It can be incredibly helpful to know!

You like knowing when it’s going to rain so you can bring an umbrella.

You get medical tests to find out as early as possible if something is wrong, so you can FIX it and avoid MUCH BIGGER problems later.

Astrology works like that.

Which is why I feel I should warn you about what’s going on this month, and into September…

TOUGH “CELESTIAL MOJO” IN AUGUST AND SEPTEMBER…

In the next month a stressful “celestial storm,” and all of our patience and goodwill, will be tested – both at the personal level, and on the world stage…

The most difficult indicators (the planets Mars and Saturn, and the “nodes of the Moon” called Rahu and Ketu – eclipse points that bring incredible impact) are all activating one another to their highest degree, in dramatic, intense signs, starting this week and lasting into mid-September, causing incredible stress and tension.

Not only that, but at the end of the month Mercury, the planet of communication, goes retrograde.

Then on September 1st, the Sun will be partially eclipsed in the sign of Leo… followed by a lunar eclipse a couple of weeks later, making us all extra sensitive.

As if that weren’t enough, the planet of love, grace, and diplomacy – Venus – goes into its weakest sign (Virgo) on the 24th of August where it stays until September 19th, making it hard for many of us to face the strain with our best behavior.

WITH EVERY STORM COMES A GIFT  

So, should we all draw the shades and hide under the covers for the next few weeks?

Of course not… but we FOR SURE need to be more loving and patient with ourselves and everyone else…

Each of us will personally be affected differently – some more than others.

These combinations – especially all happening at once – can be very rough on our relationships, and make it a difficult time to meet someone new.

This is when misunderstandings abound, patience runs thin, and tempers flare.

The good news? This is a powerful time to realize what needs to be changed or healed in our lives and hearts (as our “weak links” become more pronounced, giving us greater insight).

And this is a perfect time to REALLY see what you need to know about yourself and others, and get clarity about your love life. (This is when everyone’s mask comes off, so you get to see who they REALLY are.)

And astrology can help!

You see, we all come “preloaded at the factory” with weaknesses and strengths in our “capacity” to love – and knowing what you most need to feel your best, can help you navigate challenging times (and people!) with much less drama, and far more joy.

Amazingly, the ancient texts of Vedic astrology reveal simple techniques to uncover just this – strengths and weaknesses in LOVE CAPACITY…

If you’d like to know JUST what you need to do to feel your best at all times (even during a stressful “stellar stack up”), or just what you need to know about the “special someone” you’ve been seeing or thinking about, check out a report (The “Chart Your Heart” or “Chart HIS Heart” report) that can tell you what you need to know…

Is he too independent, angry, sensitive, workaholic, unconventional for a full relationship, or should you give it more time?

Are you accepting yourself and building yourself up to be your best, or do you keep thinking you should be someone else (someone stronger, more easy-going, and more fun than you)?

The intensity of the next few weeks could bring us all “make or break” moments… and this report can help you navigate them with as much awareness and ease as possible…

Of course, if you find you’re never your best self with someone (and neither are they) in spite of your strong feelings or attachment to them, the ancient techniques of Vedic astrology when it comes to relationship compatibility are astonishing… going WAY beyond whether or not you’ll “like” each other, but actually revealing if you can FEEL good together, and energetically bring forward each other’s best…

This is the perfect time to discover this as well!

 

Wishing you love, laughter and magical kisses,

Arielle

 

P.S. LAST CHANCE this year to spend the weekend with me….If your heart’s desire is to manifest the love of your life, and you are willing to dedicate your time, attention and intention to making it happen, then I invite you to join me August 19-21 at the beautiful Omega Institute to discover how to quickly and easily make it happen! Special powerful rituals will be done.

Love, Longevity & Toxic Thoughts

me&Br caveIf you are reading this, it’s likely you are someone who is committed to a healthy, spiritual lifestyle of meditating, yoga, exercise, practicing loving kindness and eating organic, non-GMO foods. Chances are you are focused on supplying your life and your body with things that have the highest-level of nourishment. What you probably don’t know is that there is something that quickly wipes out the benefits of all of this…. Having toxic and judgmental thoughts about your spouse!

 

Research shows that these negative emotions and thoughts actually suppress your immune system.

 

The latest science now shows that the #1 thing that will extend your life and contribute to the quality of your life, for many years, is a happy marriage!

 

Known as “the marriage effect” it’s now proven that happily married couples are:

  • More likely to live longer.
  • More likely to be physically and mentally healthier and happier.
  • More likely to recover from illness quicker and with greater success.

 

And for men, this is really important to know:

A 2007 study found that the rate of death of single men over age 40 was twice as high than that of married men. Marriage for men is a lifesaver.

 

And for those of you of the generation that would prefer to shack up over getting legally married, you need to know that living together is not the same as being married to each other. It was found that happy couples who are living together in a committed, unmarried relationship don’t receive the benefit of The Marriage Effect.

 

When I asked Harville Hendrix  (love expert extraordinaire, whom Oprah calls The Marriage Whisperer) about it, he explained that it has to do with safety and security. On the unconscious level, those committed but unmarried couples do not experience the same level of safety that married couples do.  Safety is one of our most profound human needs.

 

What about those couples who lived together for years very successfully but then got married and soon divorced? Harville says the reason stems from the emergence of the real work of marriage only after we take those sacred vows. It seems that we have to work for our security, but the pay-off is longevity and a more stable lifestyle.

 

More good news:  Sex can save your life!  Just as you commit to eating right and exercising for your well being and health, it’s important to make sure you are having sex…. the more the better.  According to leading sex expert and researcher, Dr. Pepper Schwartz of the University of Washington, studies shows that for women, sex provides lower anxiety, more vitality, a higher quality of life all while building immunity.

 

For men, sex one time a month of more will reduce his risk of dying by 60%.  The men who had sex twice a week (or more) were least likely to die and sex provides protection for men against cancer and heart disease.

 

Bottom line:  A happy, sexy marriage is one key to a long, satisfying healthy life.  Add this to the top of your program and watch what happens!

 

Wishing you love, laughter, and magical kisses,

Arielle

 

P.S. If your heart’s desire is to manifest the love of your life, and you are willing to dedicate your time, attention and intention to making it happen, then I invite you to join me August 19-21 at the beautiful Omega Institute to discover how to quickly and easily make it happen! (This is the only time this year I am offering this weekend workshop.)

Do You Feel Worthy of Love?

Have you noticed that, when you are feeling good about yourself, you naturally attract great people? Not just potential partners, but wonderful, interesting people.

Until we feel truly worthy – deep inside – of the love we desire, we won’t feel worthy of love on the outside. And when we aren’t revealing the truth about ourselves, that we ARE worthy of love, we develop patterns that prevent us from having the loving relationship we want and need. And when we do find a good relationship, we find ways to sabotage ourselves. Why would anybody do that

The pain caused by repeating these patterns is almost unbearable. And each “repeat” experience makes us feel less and less worthy of not only the love we deserve, but the abundant life we deserve.

_J7U3611rI’m so excited that my friend Nancy Levin has written a new book that digs into the roots and weeds out the old patterns that cause us so much suffering… opening us to receive the love and life the universe has in store for us.

Here is a taste of Nancy’s wonderful new book, Worthy: Boost Your Self-Worth to Grow Your Net Worth

When I use the term “net worth,” I really mean the degree of richness, juiciness, and fulfillment you have in all areas of your life, not just your bank account. Do you feel rich in your relationships? Do you have a wealth of activities you enjoy?

When we fear that we aren’t enough, or that we aren’t good enough, we also fear that we’ll never have enough. That fear is a self-fulfilling prophecy, in which we unconsciously make sure we never, ever have all that we need. It’s a painful arithmetic going on in the shadows of our unconscious, which many of us never even recognize.

Until we feel worthy – deep inside – of the great life we desire, we develop sabotaging patterns that prevent us from having the love, money, time, energy, health, joy, freedom we want and need. These habits are tenacious because they’re created by limiting, shadow beliefs that took hold in childhood, like “I’m not good enough” or “I’m not lovable” or “There’s something wrong with me.” At the foundation of all these beliefs is “I’m not worthy.” The belief of unworthiness drives our behaviors in all sorts of ways. The mash-up of money, love, and self-worth issues starts early – and that’s why we have to start by uncovering those old worth issues from childhood. If we don’t unwind the tangle of emotions and beliefs and fears that got encoded back then, we’ll stay stuck right where we are.

Here’s an exercise you can do right now to begin untangling and to reinforce the rewiring around your inherent worthiness!  Spend a few minutes with each question before writing anything down.

  • Ask yourself: “What’s the loudest message I’m receiving now about love?” Just listen for the message. Allow yourself to remember when you first heard that message. Do you know whose voice gave you that message? Write down a few notes about what you heard and remembered.
  • Ask yourself: “What is my first memory about love?” Allow any pictures to come to you. Maybe it’s the first time you understood there was a thing called “love.” Write a few notes about this first memory.
  • Ask now to remember a scene in which your parents/family related to love in some way with you, with each other. Write down what you remember.
  • Now go through the notes you took and identify what beliefs you think you developed as a result of what you remember.  Write them down.
  • Pick one belief to work with here and let yourself see a time you experienced a counter-example to that one belief. Come up with a time in your life when that one belief was proven untrue. Make some notes.
  • Now allow yourself to create a new positive, empowering belief to replace the old one. Write it down. Write it on your mirror in lipstick or dry erase marker. Put it on a sticky note on your laptop. Have an alarm go off on your phone several times a day and read it.

Once we’ve healed our internal wounds around worth, and we finally know we deserve all we desire, we open up to receiving the limitless love the universe has in store for us.

_worthyNancy will take you on a deep-dive into knowing and owning your worth that will forever expand what you believe you’re capable of! With Nancy’s gentle but firm guidance, you’ll do the internal work needed to replace feelings of unworthiness with a solid sense of your own value.

And the benefits will feed your heart. When you claim your worth and take back your power – financial and otherwise – get ready to watch amazing things start to happen! Everything you desire is within reach!

Get Nancy’s new book, Worthy: Boost Your Self-Worth to Grow Your Net Worth, today and you’ll also receive 5 exclusive bonus gifts that she created just for you!

Wishing you love, laughter, and magical kisses,

Arielle

P.S. If your heart’s desire is to manifest the love of your life, and you are willing to dedicate your time, attention and intention to making it happen, then I invite you to join me August 19-21 at the beautiful Omega Institute to discover how to quickly and easily make it happen! (This is the only time this year I am offering this weekend workshop.)

Love, Life and What Is Most Needed

One day, many years ago, Brian and I were in Tiffany’s, simply browsing all the pretty shiny and sparkling things.  As we looked through the glass cabinet at a diamond bracelet, a very elegant man in a suit, behind the counter, asked if I would like to try it on.  I immediately said to him: “Oh no thanks, I certainly don’t need anything like this.”

His instant reply floored me: “Madam, this is not about “need,” this is all about “want.”

He was right, and in that moment he gave me a distinction I had never thought about: the difference between “need” vs. “want.”

Our basic needs: air, food, water, shelter, security are obviously the most important ones and essential to life.

But, what about everything else?

Some examples:

cars2I want to eat cheesecake, red velvet cupcakes, macadamia nut chocolate chip cookies and gobs of pasta.  I am gluten and sugar sensitive, so I need to eat healthy foods. The choice is up to me.  My “wants” can hurt me.

I want to drive the big, expensive Tesla sedan.  And, I work from home and only need a very small car to get to the market in.

Now, does that mean I can’t ever have my “wants?”

No, of course not, but knowing the difference is very useful when making decisions (And, I indulge my sweet tooth nearly every day, but I limit myself to 3 small bites.)

For those of you seeking your soulmate, it’s often hard to discern between a want and a need.  One way to do it is to ask yourself this question: “Will this want/need contribute to my long-term happiness?”  If this answer is yes, then I would put it in the “need” category.

I have learned over the years that the more I let go of my “wants” and get comfortable and committed to handling my needs, knowing that I always have “enough” makes my life easier, more fun and certainly more peaceful.

Wishing you love, laughter, and magical kisses,

Arielle

 

P.S. If your heart’s desire is to manifest the love of your life, and you are willing to dedicate your time, attention and intention to making it happen, then I invite you to join me August 19-21 at the beautiful Omega Institute to discover how to quickly and easily make it happen! (This is the only time this year I am offering this weekend workshop)

The Art of Kissing

As if we needed a really good reason to kiss the object of our desire, it turns out that some researchers believe that kissing evolved as a way to assess a potential partner’s compatibility because it exchanges a host of information about health and hormonal status.

Dr. Helen Fisher, one of my favorite love researchers and biological anthropologist, says that saliva contains the sex hormone testosterone, which triggers libido,”so the more time you spend kissing, the more primed you’ll be for sex, resulting in a more intense sexual experience.”

To amp up your kissing skills, here are a few tips!

KilmtSexologist Ava Cadell recommends putting on some mint lip balm to engage the senses: “Menthol triggers the body’s cold receptors, and when that’s combined with your warm breath, you’ll feel a tingly sensation from your lips straight down to your genitals.”

Strawberries activate the sweetness receptors in your mouth, so when you kiss, your sense of taste will go into overdrive! Create a little snack of champagne, strawberries and chocolate and then see what happens!

William Cane, author of The Art of Kissing, recommends a move he calls “lip-o-suction.” To try it, softly kiss the upper lip while your partner lightly chews and sucks your lower lip, then switch.

A great kiss is more than lips and tongues….it’s hands and hugs, and whispers in the ear and lightly sucking of the ears and neck. Think about blowing gently onto their skin, maybe lightly biting them here and there, and remember to pay attention to their breathing and any moans of pleasure you may hear. It’s all about the senses …yours AND theirs.

And singles…. be sure to add to your soulmate wish list that your beloved will be a great kisser!

Wishing you love, laughter, and magical kisses,

 Arielle

P.S. If your heart’s desire is to manifest the love of your life, and you are willing to dedicate your time, attention and intention to making it happen, then I invite you to join me August 19-21 at the beautiful Omega Institute to discover how to quickly and easily make it happen! (This is the only time this year I am offering this weekend workshop!)

The Funny Side of Love

Love, Dating, Marriage, and all that it entails, can be exhilarating, amazing, awe-inspiring and at times it can also be disappointing, painful or worse. One thing that makes all of it BETTER is laughter, so today, I am sharing some of my favorite relationship jokes:

Wall LaughingWhat is a date, really, but a job interview that lasts all night? The only difference is there aren’t many job interviews where you’ll wind up naked.
— Jerry Seinfeld

I’ve been on so many blind dates I should get a free dog.
–Wendy Liebman

A chicken and an egg are lying in bed. The chicken is smoking a cigarette with a satisfied smile on its face, and the egg is frowning and looking put out. The egg mutters to no one in particular, ‘I guess we answered that question.’
— author unknown

Our courtship was fast and furious. I was fast and she was furious.
— author unknown

My father always said, “Be the kind they marry, not the kind they date.” So on our first date I’d nag the guy for a new dishwasher.
— Kris McGaha

Guy: You’re the prettiest girl I’ve ever seen.
Girl: You just want to have sex with me.
Guy: Wow, you’re smart too, I like that.
— Your Mom@HorribleDancer

Q. Why do they name hurricanes after women?
A. Because when they arrive, they are wet and wild but when they leave, they take your house and car with them.
— author unknown

LAST ONE: That tingly feeling you get when you meet someone you’re really attracted to? That’s common sense leaving your body.
— author unknown

If you have a funny relationship joke to share, please email it to me at arielleford@nullgmail.com

Wishing you love, laughter and magical kisses,

Arielle

P.S. If your heart’s desire is to manifest the love of your life, and you are willing to dedicate your time, attention and intention to making it happen, then I invite you to join me August 19-21 at the beautiful Omega Institute to discover how to quickly and easily make it happen!

Vacations Are Good for the Soul

In Venice the most romantic city in the world

In Venice, the most romantic city in the world

Mega talented Broadway writer/star of the Tony award winning show, Hamilton, Lin Manuel-Miranda has said the show was born when he went on vacation. Having the down time to relax, recharge, and reboot got his creative juices flowing and he is now a true phenomenon.

 

We humans grow and thrive when we are well loved, well rested, well fed and make the time for novelty.

 

 

 

 

New experiences open the heart, expand the mind, and feed the soul….

 

 

 

 

With our amazing God-son Zak Koenigs at the Western Wall

With our amazing God-son Zak Koenigs at the Western Wall

When we allow ourselves the time and space to create new, beautiful moments, there is space for magic to happen.

 

And, when you do this with loved ones, beautiful moments of bonding natually occur.

 

We just had an amazing two weeks of adventure. First we went to Israel for our God-son, Zak’s Bar Mitzvah in Jerusalem at the Western Wall with a small group of family and friends.

 

 

Then we spent a week in Italy with our dear friends who live near Venice. Besides having tons of fun, it was deeply relaxing and also stimulating to my creativity.

 

 

 

Brian and I having a crazy great lunch in Jaffa Israel

Brian and I having a crazy great lunch in Jaffa Israel

…Everywhere we went, our senses were treated to new sights, smells, sounds, textures and expecially tasty, yummy food.

 

 

 

 

Zak, the Bar Mitzvah boy and parents celebrate with the Rabbi. Mazel Tov!

Zak, the Bar Mitzvah boy and parents celebrate with the Rabbi. Mazel Tov!

I will soon return home renewed and ready to adopt a more languid, artistic lifestyle where I can do less yet accomplish more thanks to this break from my go, go, go routine.

 

Even if you can’t take a vacation this summer, please try to find a few hours a week to explore locally and have a mini “stay-cation.”

 

 

 

Wishing you love, laughter, and magical kisses,

Arielle

I’ll Have What She’s Having

As you read this, we are headed to Israel and Italy to celebrate our 18th wedding anniversary.  It’s hard to believe how the years have flown by!

BIG HUGWhat I love most about being married to my soulmate Brian is that every morning I wake up to someone who is SO HAPPY to see me, gives me big hugs and cuddles, tells me how beautiful I am and how much he loves me.

I live in this near daily feeling of being drenched in love, saturated in love, infused with love, support and devotion… some days it seems almost too good to be true and I just pinch myself!  BUT, it wasn’t always this way….

Like so many people, when we first got married, I really believed that since I was with my “soulmate,” marriage would be easy and effortless.

What I didn’t know then was that part of the purpose of a sacred relationship is to have a partner to learn and grow and heal with, and that doesn’t happen without challenges.

Fortunately, I committed myself to becoming a “student of love” and I was open and willing to figure out how to become a great partner.

If only someone had prepared me for all of this.

For instance….did you know that research has proven that every couple has at least 9 irreconcilable differences?  These are things that you are never going to agree on and yet we have to learn how to love and respect each others’ point of view and then come up with creative solutions.  Discovering that having this many differences was “normal” was such a relief!  One of the biggest differences for many couples revolves around money.  Almost always you get a “spender” and a “saver.”

That was a big one for me.

While at first it seemed like an insurmountable issue, it healed me of my poverty consciousness, something I wasn’t really aware of until confronted with it!

I also didn’t know that men’s brains are wired differently from women’s and that totally impacts the way we need to communicate with each other.

And, communication skills can be easily learned.

While this newsletter doesn’t give me the space to share everything I have learned about “how” to have an amazing marriage, I can tell you that whether you are still seeking your soulmate or you’ve been happily with yours for many decades, everything I have learned is in my book, Turn Your Mate Into Your Soulmate.  I have made this book easy and fun and if you are up for being a “student of love,” be sure to read it. You can get the first few chapters for free at www.arielleford.com.

Or buy it now at Amazon!

All the latest science and research now shows that the very best way to insure a long, healthy life is to have a happy marriage.  I know many of you exercise, eat right, do yoga, meditate, and drink your green drinks, so please also put your attention on manifesting your soulmate and if you already have one, become a “student of love” to create a long-lasting happy marriage.

Wishing you love, laughter and magical kisses,

 

Arielle

Marianne Williamson on love & tears

There’s an old saying that before you meet your prince, you might kiss a lot of frogs. And most of us have.

We might chuckle at that, but the truth is that the “wrong” relationships are not just wrong – they’re painful. Have you ever thought about how many tears you’ve cried over love affairs and marriages that didn’t work?

The pain of heartbreak is some of the deepest pain we experience in life, and that’s why I’m excited that my friend Marianne Williamson has written a book specifically dedicated to that: how to endure our suffering when times are tough, and most importantly how to get ourselves back up again and be even more prepared for life and love than we were before.

Here is an example of Marianne’s wisdom from her new book, Tears to Triumph: The Spiritual Journey from Suffering to Enlightenment:

 

tears-to-triumph-3d-275“The universe itself is intentional, guiding all things to the actualization of their highest potential. This includes not only individuals, but also relationships. Love is always seeking us. The problem is how often we hide from it, scurrying away from the light of love into the darkness of our fearful selves. It wasn’t that love didn’t show up for us; it’s that we didn’t show up for love.

 

A Course in Miracles says that our job is not to seek love, but to seek all the barriers we hold against its coming. Those barriers, those walls in front of our hearts, are the places where we turn our backs on love. We do various things to keep love at bay, from behavior ranging from needy to controlling, dishonest to manipulative, avoidant to addictive, too hot to too cold, self-centered to smothering. These character defects are not where we’re bad, but where we’re wounded. Still, no matter what childhood experience might have caused those defects to begin with, they’re our responsibility now. When we are displaying our rough edges, other people don’t think, ‘Oh poor dear, you’re wounded.’ They’re more apt to think, ‘Oh Lord, get me out of here.’ Which totally makes sense.

 

So, time and time again, we find ourselves blowing it at relationships – with friends, with colleagues, with family, with partners. And once again, the only real problem is our separation from God. The key to fostering soulful relationships with others is fostering our primary relationship with God, for there, we are healed of the pieces of false self with which we so often sabotage our relationships. In my relationship with God lies my relationship with my true self, and only when I’m aligned with the truth of who I am can I align with the truth in you.”

 

Once again, Marianne has hit the nail on the head. She points to the darkness so we can expose it to the light, and in so doing, illuminating the path to love. I highly recommend her book for its extraordinary depth of compassion for the tears we’ve suffered, and its practical wisdom for how to dry them. Even more importantly, says Marianne, we can do even more than dry our tears – we can learn from them, and become even better at love than we were before.

 

Whether you are single, in a relationship, or somewhere in between coupled, Marianne reveals that true healing and transcendence can only come when we finally face our pain and wrestle with what it has to teach us. She offers us a powerful way forward through the pain, to a deeper awareness of our feelings, our lives, and our true selves.

 

Get her new book, Tears to Triumph: The Spiritual Journey from Suffering to Enlightenment today!

 

Wishing you love, laughter, and magical kisses,

Arielle